John Pierre Turner

[No Context Fan TV @NoContext_FanTv]

Just a reminder of how deluded United fans were before the start of the season 🤡🤡🤡

[John Pierre Turner @JohnPierre1000]

@petefirman Great show in Stafford tonight @petefirman 10 out of 10 mate 👏👏👏

[John Pierre Turner @JohnPierre1000]

@CrimeLdn That’s not right

[John Pierre Turner @JohnPierre1000]

@alanj123455 @1PercentClubITV Its opposite numbers 1x2 8+3 4x2 7+5

[John Pierre Turner @JohnPierre1000]

@petefirman Great balls of fire!

[John Pierre Turner @JohnPierre1000]

@TalkTV Its sending me bananas!

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Christmas… the magical time of receiving a card and saying “we’ll have to get them one now”

[CCTV_IDIOTS @cctv_idiots]

When you see your ex walk into the same restaurant �

[Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson]

Tom Brady was the 199th pick in the 2000 NFL draft. Which tells me that occasionally, if not often, people assessing your future potential based on past performance don’t know shIt about anything.

[nxthompson @nxthompson]

An optical illusion for tonight. First you see a man running into the snow ... and then ...

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

95% of people in this country are normal. The extreme right sucks and extreme left suck. Both sides filled with lunatics, crazies and morons. And almost all politicians are hypocrites who manipulate these idiots for personal gain. And no I won’t run for President.I’d rather die

[Peter Hitchens @ClarkeMicah]

Perhaps, @piersmorgan, but do you ever ask *yourself* what role *you* played in creating the wild disproportionate hysteria which crashed our economy so predictably that I predicted it. I am, personally, surprised that you can sleep.

[Manchester United @ManUtd]

💫 The Reds have completed more nutmegs than any other #PL team this season 💫

#MUFC

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

I'm God, I'm omniscient, I'm the Creator of the Universe, and even I can't believe this shit.

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

He is risen.

Please stay six feet away.

[Andrew Cotter @MrAndrewCotter]

I was bored.

[Dai Lama @WelshDalaiLama]

Who wants a game of TOP CUNTS™

✅Liven up the boredom of self-isolation
✅Fun for all the family
✅Remind yourself of all the bastards to be boycotted when this is over

[Roshan G. Cheereth @RoshanGCheereth]

#FlattenTheCuve - WP comes up with a powerful graph around implications of isolation vs not ..

[Natalie Silvey - silv24.bsky.social @silv24]

This is the face of someone who just spent 9 hours in personal protective equipment moving critically ill Covid19 patients around London.

I feel broken - and we are only at the start. I am begging people, please please do social distancing and self isolation #covid19

[Molly @Carihuela]

@tracylandu @ann18521217 UK companies now hiring:

Aldi £9.48 per hour
Amazon £9.50 hour
Deliveroo £10 hour
Iceland £9.10 hour
JustEat £120 day
Lidl £9.30 hr
M&S £10.60 hr
Tesco £9.30 hr
Sainsbury £9 hr
Waitrose £9.35 hr