John Xinos

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@discodanthecane @ChicagosMayor @ChicagoMPO you misspelled Hellinois....

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Soooo many ways to simulate what a clock could do....

A clock or chronometer is a device that measures and displays time. The clock is one of the oldest human inventions, meeting the need to measure intervals of time shorter than the natural units such as the day, the lunar month, and the year. Devices operating on several physical processes have been used over the millennia.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

The Canadian government has proven so incredibly awesome at solving every problem, Phoenix pay system, ArriveCAN, an endless string of grift that would make most mob bosses blush that I literally can't wait to see what miracles our country's first public AI supercomputer will deliver. Truly, what could possibly go wrong when the same clowns that can't build a working app for under $65 million get to create computer infrastructure? Peak elbows-up competence incoming!
Hey, but I hope Connor wins a Stanley Cup—that would be cool.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@StephenPunwasi @TheophanesRex @missey_em Its function by design....

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Canada 2015-2024: Population grew by ~5.5 million new residents. Public sector added nearly 1 million jobs. So basically one new government bureaucrat for every new Canadian. Must’ve been a real challenge scouring the planet for even more people who can barely communicate in English (or French) to fill all those vital desks. Service levels? Never better! Good thing they’re floating a higher exit tax. Someone’s gotta pay for this productivity miracle when the productive ones finally pack up and leave.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@ExxAlerts Seven grams of lead would’ve been a way more efficient way to stop this without risking any harm to the K9 officer. But sure risk the good boy and turn it into a non-lethal circus instead. San Diego PD clowns.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Isn’t the entire point of the Canadian government to rape the taxpayers as hard as possible and hand all that cash over to their connected friends, consultants and insider vendors through bloated $54M no-bid contracts? Alberta building PRISM in-house with AI for just $2.6M in 10 months and saving 20x the money? Are you trying to ruin the grift?

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@BasilTheGreat what would Tommy Shelby say...

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@zachweinberg Ya, he only got in the year after

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

AWESOME! Finally the accountability system fans have been crying out for. The 10-second sub timer will of course be enforced by the same officials who need 8 minutes to decide if a toe was offside, and the 5-second throw-in clock will be tracked with the same precision they use to add injury time. All governed, naturally, by a sophisticated algorithmic system that cross references lunar phases, sundial positioning, and what the fourth official had for breakfast six days ago. Truly revolutionary — unless of course the linesman had the Full English that Tuesday, in which case he's still digesting and none of this applies.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@MPelletierCIO A contingency plan would imply a primary plan is in place...

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

https://t.co/WSh97hkIQI

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Design your own agents with Grok

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Ah yes. A 10-second substitution timer. A 1-minute medical penalty box. A 5-second throw-in countdown.

So we've invented three entirely new rules, each requiring its own mini-clock, referee judgment calls, and inevitable controversy — all to solve the problem of… time being wasted.

But don't worry, we'll still have "added time" — calculated using some secret magical formula involving ocean tides, phases of the moon, and whatever the fourth official had for lunch — which the referee may then adjust as he sees fit based on the general energy of the stadium.

If only there were some kind of device. Something that could just… stop when play stops. And start when play starts. Revolutionary stuff. Probably centuries away from that technology.

Instead, we've got refs counting to five on throw-ins like a parent threatening a toddler. "I'm going to count to five and if that ball isn't—" Corner kick. Beautiful game preserved.

We can use astrophysics to measure a toenail offside but the concept of a clock that pauses remains science fiction.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

If only — and hear me out here — someone could invent a device that counts time. And stops. And starts again. Imagine the technology. The person who cracks that would be the richest human alive.
Anyway, back to watching a ref decide the Champions League final based on how his knee feels.

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@ronmortgageguy @BarbellFi 60 days? Did you mean 60 hours?

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@XtexasgirlX WARNING - May lead to "ajob"

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

@InternetH0F W

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Update: @KitchenAidUSA responded helpfully, even though it’s not their issue. @BestBuy & @GeekSquad? Silence. No call back. No accountability. Apparently “warranty support” means you do the lifting—literally and figuratively. #BestBuyFail #GeekSquadScam #ConsumerRights

[John Xinos @johnxinos]

Bought a built-in @KitchenAidUSA ice maker from @BestBuy. Delivered by 2 guys, in a truck, with a dolly. Now @GeekSquad calls it a “small appliance” and expects me to carry it into the store for repairs. Total scam. Never again. #BestBuy #GeekSquad #WarrantyScam