joos

23 new account

[primordial soup kitchen @fernbirg]

Here Bond, a cyanide pill disguised as a mint. You can use it to kill yourself in a pinch. And this Bond, is your watch. It’s fitted with a detonator to kill yourself if necessary. And of course your gun, the Walther PPK. Only one bullet though so save it for if you’re captured.

[mike oxsmol @greetinghimeros]

obsessed with this guy on marketplace selling all of his sitcom style bachelor pad furniture bc his gf is moving in and hates everything

[Sebastian Stan Archive @sebstanarchive]

Me when I’m not bald and have real hair on my head

[🤍Vinndolyn🤍 @VinnyTheUHHH]

The “7 minutes of bonus footage to bridge the gap between endgame and Doomsday” is just gonna be some shit like this lol

[wendell sandico @wendellsandico]

they should toss Madame Web into there for fun

[Marley🎬🍉 @BHills_03]

When Christopher Nolan and Tom Cruise collaborate they’re just gonna title it ‘Movie’ and it’ll gross $5 billion

[Z*Y @ThatComicFan3]

Ok so what the fuck is the Russo Brothers’ problem 😭😭😭😭

[Rusty 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 @ImSmilingRn]

Feudal lord with ocd having to open and close his drawbridge 6 times before he can sleep

[avant-teen lucas ☀️ @noticedicried]

white people be like Don’t use the front door come in through the garage

[crust bucket @eeeosburn]

8 inches wide 0.5 inches long

[☠︎︎ maya ☠︎︎ @GOTHPlMP]

when u let someone hit your vape and they hand it back to you on turbo mode

[R⌖DDY @dckhouse]

just outbid myself 5 times on ebay not knowing it was me

[Jarvis @jarvis_best]

I sprained my finger smashing the follow back button so fast

[zane firehammer @killlikebutton]

Did you have lunch earlier you look super fat right now

[🕷️Smart Alec🕸️ @_TheSmartAlec1]

Bernthal’s stance is killing me man what is that

[parker 🕷 @fagpiastri]

sharing my screen with oomf and showing them something thats being filmed at my work and right at the bottom was an NDA i was supposed to sign

[Monty 🐉 @OpossumMont]

Do NOT eat chick-fil-a it will make you want to have anal sex with men

[5sta reze @icount_stars]

Tom Holland says he played his character Telemachus in “The Odyssey” as a 16 year old… it was supposed to be 22 years old

Robert Pattinson: “How old is Telemachus in The Odyssey”?

Tom Holland: “16 i think?”

Matt Damon: “i think it might be 18… because if i’m away 20 years…”

Tom Holland: “Damn it, i played it like 16… fuck”

Matt Damon: “But if i left when you were two, and i come back 20 years later, are you 22?”

Tom Holland: “That would be correct”

Robert Pattinson: “How would you be 16 when he’s gone for 20 years?”

Tom Holland: “yeah, i don’t know where i got that from”

“i have started sweating, cause i think i realized a major flaw in my performance”