Jokes When You Are Bored

Good jokes, bad jokes, clean jokes, dark jokes, dad jokes and all kind of jokes. 🤣😜
Follow me for daily jokes.
Enjoy it.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

Genie: I shall grant you 3 wishes

Me: I wish for a world without lawyers

Genie: Done, you have no more wishes

Me: But you said 3!

Genie: Sue me

[Laurentiu Lungu - Memes&Jokes 😂 @LaurentiuLunguu]

My doctor told me I'm going deaf.
The news was hard for me to hear.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I set the Pornhub theme as my rington, because if anyone at business meetings recognizes it they'll be too ashamed to comment.

They did stop shaking my hand though...

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I saw 2 guys in matching outfits and asked if they were gay...

They arrested me.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was really good at it.

If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I keep seeing the quote on women's tinder profiles, "If I was meant to be controlled I would have come with a remote."

Jokes on them, I've been turning women off for years without a remote.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

Interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap on your resume?

Me: That’s when I went to Yale.

Interviewer: That’s impressive. You are hired.

Me: Thanks. I really need this Yob.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

My penis may not be 12 inches

....but it smells like a foot.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

What's Harry Potters favorit way to get down a hill?

Walking.

JK, Rolling!

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I recently discovered I can move my sister's daughters through the air with my brain but not her sons.

I think I have telekinieces.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

My dentist removed the wrong tooth.

It was accidental.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I saw a homeless guy on the streets and I had 50 bucks on me...

I thought, “This’ll be wasted on drugs and booze.” So I just gave it to the homeless guy.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

Interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap on your resume?

Me: That’s when I went to Yale.

Interviewer: That’s impressive. You are hired.

Me: Thanks. I really need this Yob.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

My penis may not be 12 inches

....but it smells like a foot.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

What's Harry Potters favorit way to get down a hill?

Walking.

JK, Rolling!

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I recently discovered I can move my sister's daughters through the air with my brain but not her sons.

I think I have telekinieces.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

My dentist removed the wrong tooth.

It was accidental.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I saw a homeless guy on the streets and I had 50 bucks on me...

I thought, “This’ll be wasted on drugs and booze.” So I just gave it to the homeless guy.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

I’m hammering a nail into the wall when my wife comments “You hammer like lightning”

I replied “you think I’m that fast?”

She said “no. You never hit the same spot twice”

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

My girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman for halloween, told me that I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed.

After 2 minutes all charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.

[Jokes When You Are Bored @jokeswhenbored]

What unit of measurement do you use to weigh bones?

Skele tons!