Jon Alft

Stand-up Philosopher @greenbaychat Podcast

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

"They're never gonna survive."
--me, grumbling about my kids as I rearrange the dishwasher that they just loaded.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@JamesTate121 @NinaInsardi *stollen

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@LairdOfThManor Young girls they do get wooly, because of all the stress…

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@greengooning Or the Scots need to play a match at Lambeau Field.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@vintagemapstore West North West West North Virginia is literally what the Ojibwe word Wisconsin translates to.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@Matt_Fra_ I know @greengooning has all the answers.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@MollyBeck How the hell does Wisconsin have five?

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@RepJackKimble Chicken?

[mike freeman @mikefreemanNFL]

Manhattan. Not even close.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@WolfpackRobNC @czabe Bruh 🙄

[The GBC Podcast @greenbaychat]

We hope it sticks this time.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@ThatEricAlper Canned is way overrated there. Move glass bottled up to 3.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@RepJackKimble @WhiteHouse Maybe he’s just slowly working it through all the colors to celebrate Pride.

[Rep. Jack Kimble @RepJackKimble]

I'm really tired of how much credit Chicago gets for dying the Chicago River green for Saint Patrick's Day, when President Trump has done the same thing for America's 250th Anniversary with zero fanfare.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@czabe Love me some Teenage Wasteland.

[Freddy🇩🇪 @FreddyLA7]

Our plan for the coming days: We‘ll be staying in Texas for a few more days and return to Houston on the 17th for the Portugal vs Congo match. After that match we‘ll jump straight into the car to start driving towards Oklahoma City for the Ella Langley concert on the 18th.

[John Collins @Logically_JC]

Obama was never able to get the reflecting pool this green.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@IronStache @KevroStarr The great Eddie Murphy in “I’m Gonna Git You, Sucka”

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@MebaRackentyre Eight???

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@jvacomedy Just wait until you find out what else isn’t real.

[Jon Alft @jonalft]

@TheRobRedFord @3YearLetterman @F1abraham @LoiusFarrakan Bob, do you really pay to have your hot take replies bumped to the top like this?