benadryl enthusiast

foreskin president

[benadryl enthusiast @jonavark]

Aye there’s the rub

[kat😻 @kattatonique]

Call my dick al gore the way I run it against her bush. Is this anything

[k @lmkwhenurhome]

went on a date with a customer from the strip club and he had the year he is going to die tattooed on his knee and its kind of really soon

[PERVERTBALLMASTER3000 @snqped]

I be talking to customers with a finger in my bellybutton I don't give a gaf bro

[pinkie @onlygirlonpluto]

can we normalize being ugly useless and contributing to nothing

[Ienka @ankyhaidy]

if i was a horse and my rider went unconscious and fell off me i would drag them on the ground for sooooo many miles

[hani @crucifynisis]

oversharing on twitter dot com for two likes

[benadryl enthusiast @jonavark]

The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway The time will pass anyway

[Buck @Buck36043Buck]

I’m as happy a a Clam that wants to Kill Itself

[Florida woman @stephanicci]

Depressed people being prescribed medicine that makes them fat and unable to fuck as a final indignity

[Jay ひ @Jay2wvy]

don’t send me a live photo cause I will hold down on that shit #curiouslikegeorge

[Mr EatItThruTheJeans @synaxx_x]

I think of the phrase fat as a house at least once daily this tweet is foundational to me

[c ☆ @tintafey]

new photo of god on set of the bible

[felicity shagwell ੯‧̀͡⬮ ᡣ𐭩 @liIpochaco]

i hate when a guy does something evil and people do the whole “that’s not a Real Man, a Real Man would never do something like that” rahhh just say he’s a piece of shit. what the hell are u talking about

[luke7 @sauronluke]

This app is kind of like black mold

[ׅ❦ @cursdpanda]

when im lowkey sleepy so i decide to stay up for a few more hours

[COOLEE BRAVO @ItalianFiesta]

Because yall don’t understand idioms no more. It mean you can’t have it both ways. It don’t mean you literally can’t have cake. If you eat da cake it’s gone which means you can either eat da cake or not eat da cake.