Not Today, Mate

Antisocial stay at home dad who, just, really, can't be arsed with other people. I pick my kids up from school like they've just robbed a fucking bank.

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

It's only a matter of time before being 'just gay' is considered CIS gendered. Wait, you just love man cock? What are you transphobic!?!

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@goodbyejumbo Here's Margaret Thatcher, throw her up and catch her, squish squash squish squash, here's Margaret Thatcher.

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@friday_the_12th I couldn't watch it once, walked out half way through

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@thescoop_us If that dope is the leader, I wouldn't worry about it.

[Thomas Sowell Quotes @ThomasSowell]

"The left takes its vision seriously — more seriously than it takes the rights of other people. They want to be our shepherds. But that requires us to be sheep."

[Sean @OddNMacabre]

you hear a noise in your closet and when you open it you see this crawling up through the floor - what would you do?

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@OddNMacabre Do us a favour, mate. Pass me those sandals right at the back. Not them you twat, the ones next to them.

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

Louis XVI of France. Or as most men know him, the guy who pops up when you're halfway through typing Xvideos into Google on your phone @TwopTwips

[LADbible @ladbible]

'Extremely intoxicated' man caught peeing on the back of airline seat during flight. https://t.co/hYHTErqh3I

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@ladbible Hey, extremely intoxicated man on a plane. Stop stealing my moves @normmacdonald

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@rickygervais I have to admit, my mum showing up in Fraggle Rock would have taken a lot of explaining from the writers.

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@StopTrump2020 How old is that sign? 😂

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@missus_gumby @StopTrump2020 And it's roughly about 30 Brits too, not a big jump, but it's not 8. Unless this was from 1964

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@StopTrump2020 I call bullshit on the British 8

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@Angrypeanut4 Jesus lol

[Larry Elder @larryelder]

Collusion watch...

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@74_jah What if you're on the cusp? Depends what magazine I read

[Larry Elder @larryelder]

The REAL "collusion"...

[Not Today, Mate @JookTheMook]

@RubinReport @jordanbpeterson You be careful, Dave. Those far far lefty left liberally liberals aren't above throwing tantrums, I hear they have sharp edges #WearAHat

[Larry Elder @larryelder]

Was it something I said?

#LiberalBigots