future stay at home dad

Covid-19 Survivor

[future stay at home dad @jordsaid]

Rules:

[Stephen A Smith @stephenasmith]

Btw....Ass, Damn and hell are allowed on my page. That's mild, generic profanity. Nothing else.

[Big Cat @BarstoolBigCat]

What the fuck

[michael hess @mchlhess]

House hunting in SF is going great

[Dr. Me #WC2026 @ChrisPinnock1]

My wife called to tell me she saw a fox on the way to work.
I asked her how she knew it was on its way to work.

She hung up on me.

[Shea Serrano @SheaSerrano]

remember those And1 shirts with the faceless guy on there and it’d say something like “Go to church. Pray you don’t guard me” or whatever

i hope those make a comeback soon

[bwaap @enocbwaap]

how it feels coming back to twitter cause tiktok is banned and all the other apps aren’t as funny

[non aesthetic things @PicturesFoIder]

If Mr Krabs owned a bar

[awrealya, m.a. @BlkMissFrizzle]

Someone please update me post-hurricane about this house specifically

[☔ @Whotfismick]

Me to my wife:

[Trill Withers @TylerIAm]

Since WHO

[des @dotnetschizo]

my favourite turn based strategy game

[future stay at home dad @jordsaid]

Why aren’t there appetizers at breakfast? Feels like a big miss

[Ice @just_in_time30]

I-95 in CT is the worst highway in the country

[Historic Vids @historyinmemes]

Hulk Hogan's first reaction to Young Jeezy in 2006, he had to run it back 3 times

[Ryan M. Spaeder @theaceofspaeder]

Barry Bonds hit a Major League record 762 home runs.

Had all of his home runs been strikeouts, he would still have both a higher on-base percentage and a lower strikeout percentage than Álex Rodríguez, Sammy Sosa, Reggie Jackson, Mike Schmidt, Fred McGriff, and Willie Stargell.

[Kalon Fullerton @cowlonfull]

Beer that looks like it’s from a cartoon

[… @keglock_]

bruh, just look at bob face at the end 😭😭😭

[Trill Withers @TylerIAm]

They kill hot pie and I'll storm westeros myself

[Trill Withers @TylerIAm]

After years of hints and suggestions, my grandmother said unprovoked that maybe we do pizza for thanksgiving next year. Don’t give up on your dreams!! The shade from the tree today comes from the seed that was planted years ago!!!!