Josiah Bisem

Sports fanatic, Sci Fi enthusiast, Avid reader

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@tirii_f1 It’s probably due to marketing obligations…so much money goes into the visual marketing elements of F1 that the product has to be carefully curated to deliver that…

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

Isn’t that incredible!

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@chess_feed Rb7, Ra7

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyanSays Tanzania's soul is perishing

[Joan Reals @joan_reals]

I looked at him and felt deep disgust. Part of me wanted to tear him apart and throw him out. I held the steering wheel firmly, trying to stop myself from grabbing this man of God and shaking him.

You see, I had told him everything.

“Pastor, nataka kununua gari na naomba uniombee,” I said that Sunday after service.
We prayed, and I even planted a “seed” with the last coins I had. I didn’t want to get it wrong, and I had been warned heavily about scammers in Nairobi and Mombasa.

Pastor prayed and assured me “amenenewa.”

I trusted his prayers, but on the actual day I insisted we go to Nairobi together to buy the car. I didn’t want his anointing to be far from me.

The car-buying mission was top secret. Not even Kimemia, the cab driver, knew where we were going. I didn’t tell my mother because she would tell Auntie Susana the village radio, and within hours, the village witches would know and do what they do best.

I had paid Casey to go with me because she was the only one who could drive the car out of Nairobi.

“Nena nami,” murmured Pastor Musila, summoning the spirit as we approached the silver Volkswagen we had settled on.

“Tuongoze Baba,” I replied.

Pastor said he felt “upako” on the car the moment he touched it. My face lit up with excitement.

We even held hands with the seller and the broker for a prayer before leaving, after payment and transfer.

My first fight was with Casey, who attempted to play “Do It On Em” by Nicki Minaj. How dare she play that with the man of God in the car?

We played “Ahadi Zake” by Marion Shako as we drove from Kiambu Road towards Thika Road, heading to Kirinyaga.

When we got to Sagana, I decided to call the seller just to say we had arrived safely. His phone was off. The broker’s phone was off too. I didn’t think much of it. Transaction was already done.

December 31st, 2020. There was no way Pastor was going to walk or take a boda boda to Kesha while I had a car. It was raining heavily as I drove to pick him. Just as we were leaving his gate, the car lost power and warning lights came on.

We heavily rebuked Satan as we crawled to church in limp mode.

We couldn’t fix the car on the 1st because of the holiday. So I waited until the 3rd.

Flatbed to Nairobi Industrial Area. New ignition coils, spark plugs, service and whatever else.
Bill: 65,000.

I called the Pastor. He spoke a “word” over the phone. I drove back.

Near Murang’a Teachers College, the car failed again.

Another flatbed.
“Misfire cylinder 3, mechatronics and whatever.”
Close to 90k.

“Ni majaribu na tutashinda,” the Pastor said.

Three days later, no problem. I called the Pastor to lay hands and sprinkle holy water. I had begun to suspect Wacaro. People used to say she had a black tongue and red thighs, and that’s why she was a widow. Maybe she had "mentioned" my car.

After slaughtering a duck for the Pastor and eating, we prayed. Then I drove him home. Just after the gate, the car refused to engage Drive. Completely.

I called the mechanic.

“Sasa hiyo labda ununue gearbox mpya. If possible nunua gearbox na engine ili zipelekane.”

A tear fell.

“Pastor, uko sure uliombea hii gari?” I asked, staring at him with pain in my eyes.

Instead of answering, he started praying again, asking God to “manifest whether He truly wanted me to have the car.”

I felt bitter. Betrayed by both God and the Pastor.
Why couldn’t he have had that conversation with God BEFORE I bought the car?

Five years later, looking back, I don’t blame the Pastor. Or God.

Proverbs 1:7 says fools are condemned. And I was a fool.
Instead of taking a Pastor to buy a car, I should have taken a qualified mechanic for a pre-purchase inspection.
1 Corinthians 14 :33 says God is not the author of confusion.

Pastors preach. Doctors treat. Farmers farm.
Mechanics inspect cars.

All I needed was a technician to inspect the car.

Don’t be like me.
Talk to us to inspect the car before you buy it.
Avoid nasty surprises.

WhatsApp: [phone]

[Francis Gaitho @FGaitho237]

THE DELIBERATE DECAY OF INFRASTRUCTURE AND THE RISE OF GENTRIFICATION IN KENYA

A striking dichotomy has emerged between the politics of infrastructure development and the insidious rise of gentrification in Kenya, revealing a premeditated strategy by those in power.

Gentrification, as orchestrated by the elite, involves crafting scenarios to keep certain areas stagnant, locked in a specific class or state only to swoop in later and redevelop them on their own terms.

Take places like South C or Kilimani, once home to charming government estates and owned buildings. These areas have been systematically neglected, only to be bought up and transformed into concrete jungles by the well-connected.

This isn’t random; it’s a calculated move by those with access to planning blueprints, who shape development to favor affluent enclaves like Karen, Runda, and Muthaiga - areas paved with taxpayer money while regions like Rongai and Ngong, untouched by tarmac for decades, are deliberately starved of progress.

The corruption at the top, epitomized by figures like William Ruto, trickles down, rotting the system from head to tail.

The pattern extends beyond roads to the economic landscape, where the proliferation of big franchises and chains signals a troubling shift.

These brands, often masquerading as Kenyan despite foreign ownership, are spreading into previously unreachable areas, consolidating wealth into the hands of a few conglomerates.

This distribution of resources - negotiated through favorable tax regimes and power deals with KPLC, leaves small players to fend for themselves, unable to compete with the margins offered by these giants.

The Eastern Bypass exemplifies this: a once-bottlenecked single lane fostered a boom in local businesses, from car markets to small hotels, by allowing easy access for travelers.

Yet, the recent dualing of the road, driven by incompetent planners and engineers, introduces barriers like distant U-turns and accident-prone hazards, designed to choke out small enterprises and pave the way for politically connected big brands.

The Thika Super Highway tells a similar tale - its limited exits now cater to malls and petrol stations backed by the elite, while local businesses along the Road have withered.

This isn’t mere oversight; it’s a psychological ploy to entrench power. The government’s road agency, cabinet secretaries, and bureaucrats, hopelessly corrupt - prioritize projects that benefit their cronies, as seen in the uncompleted roads in Thika Town under Kabogo’s tenure, which killed off local commerce.

The planners’ deliberate creation of logistical barriers serves to exclude the average citizen, funneling opportunities to those with political leverage.

This intellectual anemia, bred by a leadership obsessed with stealing rather than building, threatens the survival of small businesses nationwide.

The bureaucrats, with their unchanging institutional memory, must heed this call and get their act together, or the people will no longer stay silent. Burning of StateHouse and Parliament is loading.

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyaPower_Care Hello, a report. We have been without power since 3rd Oct. In between Wangige and Kingeero. We have suffered, we have emptied our fridges & thrown food out. Now our water reserves are dry. There are no signs of assistance. Please do something!

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

Valve CEO Gabe Newell says success isn't about following your passion: 'Sounds like a great idea, but lots of people follow their passions right into a crater, you know?' https://t.co/DE7yuApCAz

Interesting take.

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@ThatEricAlper Using logarithmic tables...

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyaPower_Care we are experiencing an unscheduled power outage. Account number 30831675.

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyaPower_Care Hi, I'd like to add an account to the kp self service app. It's requesting this number which I don't have. Could you assist me?

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyaPower_Care Hi, we're experiencing unexplained power outages since yesterday. It's proving very costly. ACC no. 30831675

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@KenyaPower_Care Electricity still isn't back, the notice said until 5pm...need to work here....

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@InternetH0F Not reasonable at all!

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@gunsnrosesgirl3 The innocence of childhood...kids know too much too early nowadays...

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@F1 Team growing pains...

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@crazyclipsonly Getting involved in an argument that is none of your business is like going down the street and grabbing a dog by the ears!

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@mmmicheni First, let's ditch plastic soft drink bottles and go back to just the reusable glass bottles exclusively...

[Josiah Bisem @josiahbisem]

@hartgoat The irony of being named Treasure when your parents are so done with you they want to throw you out