Jacqueline Prestoy

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I used to judge guys that fawned over their trucks...but like I gotta move soon & beds are big so hmu

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

@thegoosemen May I please have: one eggciting on a round roll with cheddar and sausage ?

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

The people pursuing clearance at TJ Max in a snow storm are elite

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I played the drums in 4th grade bc I just wanted to be Nick Cannon in Drumline

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

The checkout girl at CVS was like “do you by chance have ADHD?”

The Tik Tok prophecy has come true.

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

When I sat on the couch with my coffee in a t-shirt and underwear this morning, I didn't know maintenance was going to use a ladder to get onto my balcony to paint it.

I am stuck here.

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I don’t have a personality that handles social isolation well

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

The beginning to any supernatural movie:

“This bite...is it an animal?”
“No”

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I just smiled at someone in Costco and she yelled
“DON’T MAKE FUN OF ME”

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

When I was a kid I used to read books at the gym ON WEIGHT MACHINES

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

Please don’t be a quiet speaker.

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

My mom kept talking about how funny Nicky Gervis' opening of the Globes was and I just stared at her until it clicked that she was talking about Ricky Gervais

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

My cat sees ghosts

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I went to the gym and realized too late that I forgot my headphones. So I turned around and got Fro Yo

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

@guacamollyw Molly I watched it three times since Saturday

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

If you like my outfit, it’s because my mom dressed me.

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

Should’ve listened to mom and worn gloves

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

@guacamollyw Omg ok so MENCHIES date soon then plz 😂😎

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

Every time I get a junk email from BonTon, I feel like I’m being contacted by a ghost

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

@quesarasaraa NO

[Jacqueline Prestoy @jprestoy]

I’m offended by “ok boomer” comments