Jared Schmidt

Free speech advocate

[Selene Mariposa @Selene_Mariposa]

The World Cup has turned America into a discovery channel for the rest of the world.

And they are not handling it well.
In the best possible way.

Here is what they are discovering:

Free public restrooms. Europeans pay every time.
Free water at every restaurant. Just appears.
Free refills. Coffee. Sodas. Iced tea. Unlimited.
Free chips and salsa before you even order.
Free warm bread with dinner.
Ice in drinks like civilized people.
Air conditioning everywhere. Not a moral debate. A fact.
Parking lots attached to the actual place you are going.
Drive throughs where the food comes to the car while you sit in it.
Ranch dressing by the gallon.
Tex-Mex that cannot be explained only experienced.
Dental care that actually works.
Buccee’s. There are no words for Buccee’s.

Then they found the grocery stores.

Five of them within one mile.
Each one the size of an aircraft hangar.
Burgers. Steaks. Brisket. Ribs. Pulled pork. Lamb. Veal. Every cut of every animal ever domesticated by human civilization available in one refrigerated aisle at ten in the morning on a Tuesday.

The Germans stood in the meat section for forty five minutes.
In silence.
Processing.

They finally understand why we do not have trains.

We have roads wide enough for the cars we actually drive.
Parking lots the size of small European countries.
Airports in every city worth visiting.

Why would we need trains.

The Germans are taking ranch home by the bottle.
The Dutch found queso and briefly lost the ability to speak.
The Japanese are photographing HEB like it is the Louvre.
The Czechs are weeping in West, Texas.

Welcome to America.
Everything is free, enormous, air conditioned, comes with chips, and has five grocery stores within a mile that will sell you any cut of any animal you have ever imagined.

Write that down. 🦋

[Josh Johnson @secondfret]

Meta HQ right now.

[Real Estate Ronnie @Lifeinvestmoney]

A/c stopped working

Local company wanted $982 to repair

Asked AI what was wrong

Prompted to replace capacitor

Bought new capacitor on Amazon for $19

Went to replace capacitor

Got electrocuted

AI said “it looks like you’re right that’s incorrect”

Went to hospital

Overnight stay cost $8,922

A/c still out

[unusual_whales @unusual_whales]

New York City spent $81,705 spent per homeless person last year.

Meanwhile, the household median income was at $81,228, per Newsweek.

[Eyal Yakoby @EYakoby]

BREAKING: In NYC at the “No Kings” rally, demonstrators waved Communist flags.

No kings, but yes Communist dictators.

[Jared Schmidt @jschmidty89]

@MarioNawfal Y'all can buy some oil from Venezuela or the Gulf of America, we got plenty.

[OSINTtechnical @Osinttechnical]

President Trump on Iran early this morning:

"Watch what happens to these deranged scumbags today"

[Noah Smith 🐇🇺🇸🇺🇦🇹🇼 @Noahpinion]

HOLY SHIT

The original CNN post was just "two guys were out on a nice walk, when suddenly their lives were changed forever, when they started throwing bombs"

You can't make this shit up

[Taya Bass @travelingflying]

Liberal was preaching ‘All are welcome in New York’ when an immigrant climbed on his back to throw a bomb. Even after that, he still welcomes everyone to New York.

Liberals are idiots.

[Jared Schmidt @jschmidty89]

https://t.co/CaHPZTfxmi

[Jared Schmidt @jschmidty89]

https://t.co/mW1aLUSXQf

[The ₿itcoin Therapist @TheBTCTherapist]

If you don’t laugh at this I can’t trust you

[Savanah Hernandez @Savsays]

As we say goodbye to Jasmine Crockett, never forget the campaign ad she released where Trump just calls her a “low IQ person” for 30 seconds straight.

A true piece of art that will never be forgotten ✊🏿

[Mario Nawfal @MarioNawfal]

🚨🇧🇭🇮🇷 Bahrain just listed every country Iran hit tonight at the UN Security Council.

Saudi Arabia. UAE. Qatar. Kuwait. Jordan. Syria. Bahrain itself.

Every single one a Muslim-majority nation. Most of them Arab. None of them Israel.

Iran launched this as resistance against America and the Zionists.

It ended with every Arab neighbor condemning them at the United Nations.

[Frankly Frank @NoFrankingWay]

Were gonna be able to vacation in Gaza, Cuba, Venezuela, Iran and maybe Minnesota soon. Incredible times.

[Mario Nawfal @MarioNawfal]

🚨🇺🇸🇮🇷 BREAKING:

Trump just confirmed it officially.

Khamenei is dead.

"The bombing will continue, uninterrupted throughout the week or as long as necessary."

And the most significant line: IRGC and military forces are reportedly seeking immunity deals.

The regime isn't just leaderless. It may be surrendering.

[Max 📟 @MaxNordau]

The Iranian regime launched a rocket.

It misfired and fell near a school.

Iranian regime propaganda outlets immediately reported that it was a U.S.-Israeli strike that killed exactly 51 children and injured exactly 60 children.

Comic Dave Smith immediately believes it.

It’s all so Palestinian.