John Rando

Just some guy in flyover country. Wife, couple of kids, and a house. Nothing more complicated than that. Most likely not a bot.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best I’m generally skeptical of Jarvis’s snack proclamations but this one seems to be real upon closer inspection. Followed.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best The incapacitated intern needs those networking opportunities. He’s going to be a Congressman one day.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best You know it’s a HIPPA violation to identify him by name in a mean post, right?

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best It says a lot about where we are that I’m sort of unironically agreeing with this sentiment.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best Hobo was an elite Halloween costume back in the day if you were lazy and made no plans. All you need is dirty clothes and a stick and bindle.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best To be fair you wanted to do those things anyway.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@susancolvin333 You understand that in nice neighborhoods we like to see the cops, right?

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@JakeCrain_ @DMichaud28 We’ve fired three coaches in the last six years. I don’t think Auburn’s problem is too much patience.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@TMZ Just shoot her up with a 10x dose of some of the spare fentanyl laying around in the evidence room. Problem solved.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best Yeah I feel like this was the sort of problem that could’ve been solved by a guy with a pillow and no sense of remorse.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@EWErickson If you make an ad about welfare recipients and the target is a young white dude, then you are race obsessed. Someone who isn’t obsessed about the potential reaction of particular races wouldn’t do that because it’s ridiculous.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@BradOnMessage It’s not “playing identity politics” to point out nonsense. We’ve all seen the home security ads where every burglar is a white dude, which is ridiculous, and is only done to placate identity groups. This is no different.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best I add and lose two pounds over the course of a day, and I’m not even that fat.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@AndriusBend @MattWalshBlog He also has other children with her and has to navigate that nightmare. Does he want to tell the other kids that mommy is a monster or that mommy was profoundly sick? How does he navigate the fact that he’s passed on those genes? He’s wrong in how he’s reacting, but I get it.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@MattWalshBlog You do a lot of weird stuff when the person you love the most does something unthinkable. It scrambles your brain. You simply cannot believe you ever completely trusted someone who could be that awful so you excuse the inexcusable to make it make sense. He’ll come around.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best Just a bunch of high pitched ginger nerds running around the park prattling on about how awesome France is.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@Breaking911 How do you possibly fence $250,000 worth of fried chicken?

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@AuronMacintyre The biggest criticism from the people who hate the establishment is that the establishment is (or at least pretends to be) too politically pure to get anything done. That’s true, but outright refusal to work with them is its own form of impractical purity.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@DavidMMcintosh If the mom had just strangled the kid to death the State of Massachusetts would’ve thrown her a parade and called her a hero.

[John Rando @just_a_rand0]

@jarvis_best Andy Reid Kansas City 9 had me losing my sh*t. Posts like these make me hope they’ll let you keep your phone and issue you a couple of electricity waivers after you’re deported to Saskatchewan.