Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones

Typos all my own. Waiting in vain tor the Blackberry Line to re-open. so a lot of #TheArchers content.

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

I’m sure others have made the point before now, but doesn’t norovirus only last about 24 to 48 hours?

In Ambridge, norovirus appears to last 24 episodes.

#TheArchers

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

I wouldn't let my daughter out of the house dressed like this

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

After the enthusiam collectively felt everywhere on 5 July, my joy at the change of government is rapidly turning to dismay.

What were the Starmers THINKING!!!!! (And the other Labour recipients of largesse.)

#Starmergate

[Owen Jones @owenjonesjourno]

Can we agree on something.

If a Tory leader

a) Backed policies which condemned vulnerable children and pensioners to poverty

b) While accepting £100,000 worth of freebies on a massive salary

Labour supporters would unite in outrage. Yes or no?

https://t.co/rldJm0bU89

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Continue to invite women over the age of 71 for routine mammograms - Sign the Petition! https://t.co/G0FSfMLQFw via @UKChange

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Was Lilly’s mystifying quest for her ‘hot girl summer’ the Pargetter-Lower Loxley version of Charli XCX’s ‘brat girl summer’?

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@MrWeir

Happy birthday, Matthew!

I hope you’re having a great birthday and are keeping it 100% Ambridge-free.

Thank you for all your very entertaining hard work on The Cider Shed Pod. It’s a real treat of a listen.

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@sarah_mattocks Like all enforced jollity, they are an ordeal.

What’s wrong with an enjoyable meal? Isn’t that enough?

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Good morning #TheArchers fans!

The optimistic mood created by the football was slightly dampened by the ick-inducing scenes between Denise and Alistair on their boat.

I predict nothing but heartache and pain for Denise’s family when they are eventually told about the affair

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@saturnexpress I am so confused because presumably the ?CPS? must have decided that Alice has a case to answer, but based on what evidence?

I know the justice system in this country is very shaky at the moment, but this is out and out bewildering.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Good morning all!

I’m sure I’m the 47,563rd person to state this, BUT WHO SAW ALICE DRIVE HER CAR AT THE TIME OF THE ACCIDENT?

And why isn’t Alive’s solicitor asking for evidence that Alice was in charge of her car?

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Justin sounds as though he’s got strangles.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Good morning Tweetalongers:!

May I say how much I enjoyed the two Emma-generated jokes this week?

SWs: more humour of this calibre, please.

It was a joy to hear after the Harrison-Fallon-strangles-alcoholic Alice fandangos.

#TheArchers

[The Cider Shed @TheCiderShedPod]

Emmurrr: All he does is stand in fields and breaks wind.

George: Yes, but we all still quite like Brian.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Good morning #TheArchers Tweetalongers!

While we wait for George’s misdeed to be unveiled, could those amongst the Tweetalongers with better memories than mine remind me which other SL took an age to be finally revealed? Was it something to do with Helen and Rob?

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@DavidfromBarnet Yes, Alice won’t be the only one feeling nauseous.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@wendyjpitt61 The repressd Victorian judgement moralist in me very much hopes so!

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

At the risk of sounding like a desiccated old Victorian spinster, I don’t approve of Jim’s plan.

Denise has got to sort her home life out before she starts cavorting with Alistair. That’s the honourable choice. NOT making out in your bit on the side’s dad’s house.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

@asteroidchick Good point.

And of course Denise doesn’t know about this father-and-son-matched plan as yet, so I’ve accused her of something she may not agree to!

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

I am seriously beginning to think Alice is a bit dim.

#TheArchers

[Kaff Cauliflower Éclair Jones @kaffpot]

Oh no

Alice has fallen for unreliable Horse Boy’s mind games (or should it be called dressage?)

#TheArchers