Karla Jeggle

Roses are red, paper is white, I feel God in this Chili’s tonight

[Rev. Benjamin Cremer @Brcremer]

Then Jesus said unto the sick, “you better have insurance.”

Then Jesus said unto the stranger, “are you here legally?”

Then Jesus said unto the hungry, “my taxes better not be paying for these loaves and fishes.”

Then Jesus said unto the poor, “this is your own fault.”

[aarøn. @ayroned]

You know Te-hina Paopao humble as shit cuz if that was my last name and I was knocking down big shots you’d have to call the national guard to stop me from doing finger guns

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

if screens bad why watching big screen while holding little screen feel so good

[empress sissi @historicalfits]

I love when songs have a plot twist. like when you find out that the skater boy is now dating avril lavigne

[Dave Jorgenson @davejorgenson]

The strike has been over for six hours, where is Severance season 2

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Forever has a nice ring to it 💍 @ Chicago, Illinois https://t.co/Rfz4puu3bC

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Lei-ing low for a few weeks in Hawaii
🌺 🌺 🌺
Not pictured: The dolphins, octopus, turtles, peacocks, whales, mongooses, and a shark (!) that we saw @ Hawaii https://t.co/WmPIA1iBFC

[baby ganoush @ssactrub]

Having not gotten covid yet feels like I've been hiding in the back of a 2+ year long middle school dodgeball game and the front lines have been THINNED

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Happy 2 years to the guy who can make even a global pandemic into an adventure 🤙🏼 There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck inside with, watching Ted Lasso for the 15th time @ Hawaii https://t.co/JJtVrGCz8h

[Reductress @Reductress]

Woman Not in the Mood for a Whole Movie Watches Five Hours of TV Show: https://t.co/QQa1h4zY68

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

having friends over isn’t just about having a good time. It’s about being forced to finally clean your apartment

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Every four years I am reminded that the #Olympics theme song is an absolute banger #Tokyo2020

[Shawn @ShawnHils]

there are two teams named after socks.

[mads @napkin_soup]

Bo Burnham: Inside (2021)

[Georgia Hardstark @GHardstark]

Has a ceiling fan ever actually fallen out of the ceiling or is that just a collective human fear built into our DNA??

[Angry Orchard @AngryOrchard]

Ok this was not the plan, but the love for the Boozy Box has been too strong...

10K retweets and we’ll find a way to make it happen for real 🧃🧃🧃

[gabe bergado @gabebergado]

when more vaccination appointments are added

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Flying HI 🚁 @ Honolulu, Hawaii https://t.co/I44xcXOvKg

[Karla Jeggle @karlajeggle]

Started from “Wanna work from Hawaii for a month?”, now we here
🌺
Alternate Caption: Let’s get this Hawaiian roll @ Honolulu, Hawaii https://t.co/HhtnBVb5dG