Troy Gorton

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

I'm think about taking up Jousting so I have something to talk about at awkward dinner parties. http://t.co/AfAiTatQ5M

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

I brush my teeth a lot longer when I'm around another person. http://t.co/UqITl4Wje5

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

No one has 99 problems. That's so many problems. http://t.co/wV7iTOEqGj

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

Dogs do their social networking on Assbook, via the World Wide Whiff. http://t.co/QpD0MPkHhU

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

I judge a book by it's cover when the cover is a picture worth 1000 words. http://t.co/fefRoNrh

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

http://t.co/Kdovx7z8 "Don't even talk to me until I've Instagrammed my coffee." - Portland, Oregon

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

http://t.co/BRDanSDh I had to ground my son for cursing. He turned the girl next door into a frog.

[Troy Gorton @kartney]

Money can buy happiness. Give me 100 million dollars and I'll prove it to you. http://t.co/LWEEe0gB