I’M KARL

flirtin and squirtin

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

Been tempted to apply for a work visa in Scotland ngl

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

Not men making me sad again

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

@Nirvelligras told me I was long in all the wrong ways

[Terms of Aquarius @AquariusTerms]

#Aquarius Dilemma : To hook up (and risk losing each other) or To not hook up (and save the friendship).

[Terms of Aquarius @AquariusTerms]

An #Aquarius might be nice and friendly to you, but that doesnt mean they are interested in dating you.

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

I just referred to my brain as a “bone wrapped jelly sack” and I don’t think I can ever recover from that

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

Alyse: (for her birthday) your gift was your love and kindness……………kindness? Not that @Nirvelligras

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

“There was a cartoon penis… I was underage”

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

“I wanna hang out with you but I need to play call of dutyyyyyyy” @Nirvelligras

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

#NewProfilePic

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

Alyse: “oh I forgot I have to get drunk” 😂

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

“I’m trying to find the sexy boomer meme”

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

Alyse: “I’d only fuck Paul Bunyan and Johnny Appleseed”

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

No one:

Alyse: “what’s that?… SCROTUM”

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

If anyone else tells me “oh you might change your mind later” about growing and birthing a child, I will throat punch them.

[I’M KARL @karwyjo]

My dad looking at croissants: “this one has a weiner”