kat

I do science and cut my hair too short in the front

[kat @katbtweetin]

what's my trick to staying cool and relevant you may ask? going to bed at 9:30 every night

[kat @katbtweetin]

REVISION: Bota Box Pinot Noir is no longer the preferred everyday wine.

Black Box's Cabernet Sauvignon reigns supreme. Unclear on whether taste buds have changed, or if this is due to the vintages available at local grocier. Will update as the situation unfolds.

[kat @katbtweetin]

After two years of extensive research and experimentation I have confirmed my original hypothesis that Bota Box Pinot noir is, in fact, the best everyday wine.

[kat @katbtweetin]

Friends sprinkle some ranch powder on cottage cheese and your life will CHANGE

[kat @katbtweetin]

wait wait wait is a dirty martini..... just a gin pickleback???

[kat @katbtweetin]

Seriously! A botulism outbreak in 2015 lead to the death of one woman and hospitalized 23 after a lady brought potato salad made with improperly canned produce to a church potluck

[kat @katbtweetin]

Me, explaining how the units "inches water" make sense for negative pressure rooms in the hospital.
A nurse: wow, you should have been an engineer!
Me: boy, do I have some news for you

[kat @katbtweetin]

@wooaahhmallory Mallory this is SO COOL

[kat @katbtweetin]

I took a personality quiz to see what characters in pop culture I'm most like and one of them was Xander Harris so if you need me I'll be in the bottom of the Arkansas river with 10 cinderblocks chained to each limb thank you, I'm sorry, and I'll see you all in the next life

[kat @katbtweetin]

Jokes on them, Wes and I wear the same size & we steal each other's shoes all the time

[kat @katbtweetin]

@wooaahhmallory Ur thriving!!!!

[kat @katbtweetin]

@jaryn_phillips Have you done today's? Rude

[kat @katbtweetin]

What to call my first batch of kombucha?

[kat @katbtweetin]

Wordle 262 6/6

Why was this so hard for me

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🟩⬛🟩🟩🟩
🟩⬛🟩🟩🟩
🟩⬛🟩🟩🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

[kat @katbtweetin]

Wordle 259 3/6.

So I've started playing Wordle......

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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

[kat @katbtweetin]

When I first got my IUD I was consuming a lot of zombie content and I am embarrassed by how many nightmares I had about having to remove my own IUD in a post-apocalyptic zombie world

[ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl]

actually my biggest fear about the apocalypse is probably just losing my glasses

[kat @katbtweetin]

Okay friendos- if any of my followers have/are currently reading Wheel of Time - I need to talk. Please reach out. I have feelings and I need to talk

[kat @katbtweetin]

@jnewmm Still mad about it

[kat @katbtweetin]

@jnewmm I have to parallel park in front of my house every day and have gotten to where I can do it on the first try 9/10 times. So tell me why the first and only time I've had to parallel park *in public* in two years I immediately backed into an SUV.

[kat @katbtweetin]

important

[Thick Bleach @N13ollox]

@jazbrisack

[kat @katbtweetin]

@margotwood @AtwaterRhodes Red Sister by Mark Lawrence

First line: "It is important, when killing a nun, to ensure that you bring an army of sufficient size. For Sister Thorn of the Sweet Mercy convent Lano Tacsis brought two hundred men.”

I mean COME ON