Katherine

Future old person, current accountant, past student

[Katherine @katrbale]

I just quit that job and turns out, the real Burger King is the friends we made along the way

[Katherine @katrbale]

*at a fast food interview*
INTERVIEWER: do you have any questions?
ME: yeah can I apply to be the Burger King or do I have to defeat him in hand-to-hand combat

[Katherine @katrbale]

@anikacchase I mean that the lyric seems like it was written by a 30 something and not a teenager so it’s so out of place

[Katherine @katrbale]

@anikacchase The new lyric is just so folklore 😭

[Katherine @katrbale]

We did it folks

[Katherine @katrbale]

@ezra_bale As your wife can confirm

[Katherine @katrbale]

@ezra_bale Can confirm this list is exceptional 🤌

[Katherine @katrbale]

I quite frankly cannot comprehend why Boston doesn’t have a Cinnabon

[Katherine @katrbale]

@twiteric_ I won’t even lie, that is embarrassing

[Katherine @katrbale]

Can’t believe I’ve finally fulfilled my role as “friend walking by college tour group that the tour guide waves to”

[Katherine @katrbale]

You think you know fear? Try approaching a trash can and bring surprised by a squirrel coming out of it. That’s fear

[Katherine @katrbale]

@jul_pir Eczema culture is just everyone taking it seriously but you

[Katherine @katrbale]

Unexpected pandemic side effect: I haven’t received a free phone wallet for the back of my phone in so long and mine is falling apart 😅

[Katherine @katrbale]

@ellairm224 Ah of course, to unlock an alto you need the old woman expansion pack (she is the hot one but almost dead)

[Katherine @katrbale]

I love when musical theater shows are like “ah yes we have roles for women! We have the hot one and the dead wife ☺️”

[Katherine @katrbale]

@bennettleigh The significant others of your friends’ friends? Top tier

[Katherine @katrbale]

Is it possible to be outgoing and good at playing piano at the same time?

[Katherine @katrbale]

@hannnahpbieber It is a GREAT story to tell at parties though and maybe that was the reason

[Katherine @katrbale]

If I have not adopted a cat within the first 24 months of my professional career, I will be disappointed in myself.

[Katherine @katrbale]

@konewvine @EricTrump @realDonaldTrump 3. Biden wasn’t trying to fill a room during a pandemic

[Bernie Sanders @BernieSanders]

Joe Biden will win the popular vote by over 4 million votes. The Democratic nominee for president has now won the popular vote in 7 out of the last 8 elections. One person, one vote. Democracy must rule.

Yes. We should abolish the electoral college.

[John Mulaney @mulaney]

...And stay out!