˗ˏˋ KATIE ˊˎ˗‏

dracula's second born child | she/her

[˗ˏˋ KATIE ˊˎ˗‏ @kayjoooo]

I've been severely delayed in making @chrissyteigen everything bagel bake because I read the recipe as requiring three-day old bagels instead of (3) day-old bagels and I just couldn't for the life of me figure out where to acquire a three-day old bagel cc: @jmontrone

[emilia 🍒🥇🏆 @lexiescarina]

imagine you get elected mayor and two of your sports teams immediately win championships

[najihah꧂ @gideonsrue]

LMAOKSJDNSJ

[Tina Turtle 🐢 @tinaturttle]

I saw this on threads. Idk it’s beautiful.

[victoria @bugluvr13]

why does everyone on love island kiss like that. do i kiss wrong

[ju༊·˚ @juloccd]

cop with a kid that’s two strikes.

[Jaidon |6’5 bottom defending Lisa Barlow| @xcxbase]

when that queen recreates this at the fire pit elimination

[kyle @kgeich]

One day your kids are gonna ask where you were for the 2026 Summer House Reunion

[meezy @almeezyuh]

they’re having ugly sandal show and tell under this tweet

[erb @bentleyliz2]

excuse me........ what?????????????????

[erinspresso @riverindaIe]

does anyone remember when katie maloney dated that 25 year old named satchel

[LRMF @LRMF54]

What means “Hantavirus”

[Mariella ! @pfaffphobic]

I didn’t see a single “it’s gonna be May” meme this year which is personally a massive relief, but culturally a signifier of something much darker.

[NBC Bay Area @nbcbayarea]

Shockwaves across San Francisco as Mayor Daniel Lurie ordered 127 layoffs across 18 departments — and there could be more as the city faces a massive budget shortfall: https://t.co/StmSq06n9Z

[my life is a living hell. every minute is torture @on_da_spectrum]

Hey man, do you mind if we push this call til next week? I’m thinking one or both of us might die in the upcoming nuclear holocaust, which would pretty much solve this whole problem for us

[Poor Lawyer @poorlawyer]

The fact that 2028 LA Olympic tickets for gymnastics are, on avergae, 287% more expensive than 2024 Paris tickets piss me off so much. Completely vile.

[Duncan Smith @DuncanSmithNBA]

Shouts to the astronauts for being willing to make this weird. No need to dig him out of this hole

[Pop Tingz @PopTingz]

Hayley Williams at a recent concert:

“I hate Morgan Wallen.”

[Berry ⏾ @auraonx]

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Why are the standards higher for The Bachelorette than the President of the United States?