Maris Piper

Mainly interested in potatoes, and finding new ways to escape the humdrum of life.

[WeAreFairCop @WeAreFairCop]

1/2 Breaking!!!! A #PartyofWomen candidate reported a threat to @northumbriapol @POWLizPanton

They did not take the threat seriously and put the phone down on her… or so they thought. In fact, the line stayed open and we have the recording of what was said:

PC 1: What does she think happens? You have put yourself out there, as the voice of the people, and people out there don't like what you have to say.

PC2: She accepted that in all fairness. I don't think there's any real credible threat.

PC1: Ah she won't accept that. She's made reference to getting punched and tagging her leaflet. But you were giving them out! You cannot take back the fact that you are handing the fucking things out! I don't get it!

Male voice: "If anyone's going to come and punch her it's going to be . . .”

PC1: “ME!”

PC2: (Laughing) Punch a Nazi!

Two of the officers were female. They work for @CCJardineNP

[derek guy @dieworkwear]

The reason why Tony Soprano looked cool is because he wore high rise, double pleated trousers with a slightly fuller leg that ended in a gentle single break. No one talks about this.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

If we weren't meant to put cotton buds in our ears, why does it feel so natural? Checkmate, atheists.

[Michael Rosen 💙💙🎓🎓 NICE 爷爷 @MichaelRosenYes]

One of the great achievements of the last 20 years is to prevent children from getting hold of free books. We did this by closing hundreds of libraries and sacking thousands of librarians.

[Otto English @Otto_English]

Reality check:

● 31 royal engagements in four months.

● Roughly two a week.

● He's a working royal so he gets paid and receives a grace and favour home at Kensington Palace

● These "events" include going to a recital at Downing Street and eating lunch

[Fesshole🧻 @fesshole]

I have friends who send long, rambly voicenotes. I always tell them "weird, that came through corrupted, what did you say in it?" and it turns out they CAN form a coherent thought and type it out.

[Dr. Dame Katy Denise CH GBE 🏳️‍⚧️🇳🇬🪑 @damekatydenise_]

Raising a glass to all womxn, birthing contraptions & non men today! Affirm yourself & know your worth; I am beautiful inside & out. I’m more than just a sex object. I am womxn, hear me roar!

#InternationalWomensDay #TransWomenAreWomen #TransRightsAreHumanRights
#IWD 🏳️‍⚧️

[Sandford Police Commentary @Sandford_Police]

Please be advised that there might be disruption to roads and travel services due to #StormIsha

Please do not call us if you decide to go out and you get stuck because of the storm

That is your fault and your responsibility to sort yourself out

[honeybadgerpanda @marixapanda]

🤣😂

[Maris Piper @kaykagan]

Why do ITV seem to think it acceptable to push womanface onto their audiences, rather than use actual female contestants in their shows?

[Foka Wolf @fokawolf]

HM Government Food Bank
2010 - 60k people used food banks
2023 - 2.98 million people used food banks
Street install with Imbue

[#WOMENSART @womensart1]

Pensioners protesting outside Margaret Thatcher's home, London, 1980 by photographer Jane Bown #WomensArt

[amykaufman @amykaufman84]

33 years ago tonight, 14 women went to bed thinking about their finals, future in STEM and the upcoming holiday season. They didn’t know that these dreams threatened a man’s sense of self worth and that they wouldn’t survive to see their goals and aspirations become a reality.

[Maris Piper @kaykagan]

We don't say "shut up" in this house.

[Anon Opin. @anon_opin]

Are you having a conversation on your phone through the speaker? Don't. Every single person you can see thinks you're an arsehole.

[BBC North East @BBCNEandCumbria]

An endangered mammal will be granted a safe haven in Northumberland https://t.co/FOnp2aHPTP

[Maris Piper @kaykagan]

Mmmmmmm. Crisps.

[Allround Vegetable Processing @AllroundVP]

Ever wonder what goes into your favourite bag of chips?

Here we show you the complete process of making potato chips, from selecting the freshest potatoes to crispy potato chips.

#Allroundvp #potatochips #chips #potatoes #washing #grading #sorting #polishing #snacks

[Massimo @Rainmaker1973]

The Olive tree of Vouveson on the island of Crete, Greece, is one of the oldest olive trees in the world.

Scientists from the University of Crete have estimated it to be 4,000 years old, which means that, when it sprouted, the last mammoths were still walking on Earth, someone in China was discovering bronze casting and the seventh Egyptian dinasty was declining.

The Minoan civilization was thriving and its monumental architecture was adorning the island of Crete. The first stones of the Palace of Minos at Knossos which inspired the myth of the Minotaur were laid.

This tree saw the humans deeds for thousands of years, from the Bronze Age to the artificial intelligence and, possibly the most amazing thing, it continues to produce olives at every season.

[Scarred for Life @ScarredForLife2]

Have a good bonfire night, however you're celebrating! Just make sure you don't end up like these kids...

[Daniel Sugarman @Daniel_Sugarman]

A piece I encourage you to all read.

A first person account of a Jewish employee at The Guardian, in the immediate aftermath of October 7th.

If you're anything like me, it will make you incredibly angry. It also won't surprise you in the slightest.

https://t.co/ATeYJl0wVr