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[Buck @Buck36043Buck]

You could probably Waterboard a lot of Information out of me. I have a Very low tolerance for Discomfort

[Lynne @_ayandamay]

And the bear sure as hell doesn’t invite his fucking friends

[ً @artfuIchaos]

dating me is like having a migraine and a boner at the same time.

[nancy @d0gtired]

Honestly fuck your warty pumpkins on the steps to your beautiful historic brownstone that has quintupled in value since you bought it

[Amigo @Topboix]

"i love your eyes" you're about to steal the light out of them aren't you

[🦨 @bootlegshakira]

therapist just told me i’m too emotionally fulfilled by my friends and family to take men seriously LMFAO

[m̃ @hexesandspell]

Muse by accident. Menace by nature.

[pinkie @pinkamaniaa]

forget everything i’ve ever said unless it was smart or funny in that case remember it forever

[Danny404 @Daniel890680121]

U better keep me delusional as long as u can. realistic me is a cold mf.

[Maryam @hell_line0]

We choose the bear because if it drugged and assaulted us for 7 hours, authorities would shoot it not ask it to write an essay and then help it find a job at a wealth management firm. Be so for real, Cornell.

[grovy @grovymango]

All these advances in technology but nobody wants to do anything about printers

[𝖓𝖎𝖈 @missNgrunge]

i’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. i shut up and subtitles come out of my face

[Epic🧚 @AQSa1723]

if you only support abortion in cases of rape or incest, you’re reinforcing the idea that in order for a woman to have a right to her body, someone else has to violate it first.

[5 @comeuptuff]

what a privilege it is to be exhausted by an ambition of your own choosing

[Antidepressant Content @depressionlesss]

Me: *wakes up at 4:15 AM to drink water*
My cat: magnificent. since we are both awake, I assume the morning shift has officially begun.

[julia @juumelo_]

I think it’s okay to be a little evil as long as you have whimsy in your heart and a twinkle in your eye

[kelly @BoyYeetsWorld]

The cost of community is inconvenience I say to myself as I go to multiple events every weekend because I’m popular and cool as hell

[ຸ @fvckfemi_]

if i do things for you, it's not for u to love me, it's so you know i love you

[COCO @TWOTIMESABITCH]

this lady said “there’s no universe where the person who shattered your soul is the love of your life” let that’s sink in.

[bunny @fadedbunny]

i’ll take the molly with a capri sun