peach_rascal

“”we are going to jump on board and cut them into pieces.” -Blackbeard” - Micheal Scott

[Care-ington @carrington_17]

100$ to any guy who doesn’t passive aggressively shame girls/women for doing whatever the fuck they wanna do whenever the fuck they wanna do it

[Rachel McCartney @RachelMComedy]

Oh, you have anxiety? Name 5 friends who secretly hate you

[hannah @discounthannah]

No one:

Literally no one:

Person who studied abroad: take me backkkkkkk😩

[peach_rascal @Keeeeeleigh]

Going to work with 0 will to live was exactly as hard as I thought it would be

[SpongeBob @SpongeBob]

Who's feeling ugly & proud today?

[peach_rascal @Keeeeeleigh]

@bertkreischer I get overwhelmed when 3 people text me. I cant imagine how many text you’re getting. Don’t listen to the haters ❤️ you’re doing great 👍🏻

[Nihilist Arby's @nihilist_arbys]

Not only will you be forgotten, but all your precious possessions, every last one of them, will vanish into obscurity too. You are literally nothing.

Enjoy Arby’s

[Peyt @bosley_peyton]

My sister used a Kroger bag to bleach her hair and the logo came off on her head happy Monday

[Phil @ifyouwereafo]

I tried making a video this morning & my roommate did this 🙃

[peach_rascal @Keeeeeleigh]

@mystical_haki @bertkreischer @tomsegura I was excited until I realized this is the same response I got ☹️

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

midwest nice is putting your paper plate upside down in the trash so you don’t offend whoever made the stuff you didn’t eat

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

Midwesterner trying to ask someone for a favor: Hey could you help me with this thing? Absolutely no pressure though. Totally ok if you can’t. If you’d rather run me over with a car that’s cool. Ope, I’m sorry. Are you mad at me?

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

The 8 layers to a Midwestern goodbye:

- about to leave warning (stand up)
- a "we've gotta go" statement
- hugs
- walking to the doorway
- one more conversation in the doorway
- more hugs
- continue talking while everyone's piling in the doorway
- placing hand on doorknob

[Midwest vs. The Rest @midwestern_ope]

Midwest Dad Thread: *vacation to do list*

1. Wake up at 6 AM for no reason
2. Yell at the gps
3. Try to make people feel bad for sleeping in
4. Google search history facts of the area
5. Always walking 30 feet ahead of everyone else

[𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐖𝐞𝐢𝐫𝐝 𝐓𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫s @FabulousWeird]

Scaling up a pen