Keith Talent

Surfact sales mercenary. Also horological enthusiast, lighter than air flight expert. Considering having blood replaced with a nice zin.

[Molly Ploofkins @Mollyploofkins]

This is the first time he's slept next to his wife in years.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

@TFAtweets Tactical turtleneck is an Archer reference. Clearly a fan in the branding department.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

Today's seems as good a day to jump back onto twitter as any. First tweet in forever.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

@BCFerries are there delays on the weekends for walk ons with bikes for the tsawwaeesen Swartz bay routes?

[Tim Burgess @Tim_Burgess]

Thursday April 23rd
10pm (UK time)

Matt Johnson will be joining us for an extra special listening party, featuring @thethe’s Infected.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

The only positive about today's Seahawks/Cowboys game is one of those deplorables is heartbroken next weekend.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

@burnabyschools hello? Is this account monitored? Volleyball at caribou hill and the custodian forgot to open the seating.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

https://t.co/KiUD5Cwtwi

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

@GB24Hours It's an experimental anticoncussion device. It increases blood surrounding the brain to add cushioning in the skull.

[Dr. Peter Cullen Bryan (https://linktr.ee/pcbryan) @pfxbryan]

@SamSykesSwears I remember my first tour. The boy next to me, tinsel spilling out of his belly. Those dreadful bells that meant the next wave was incoming. The sound of carols mingling with dying screams. We fought then so that future generations wouldn't have to, but we failed. #WarOnChristmas

[Sam Sykes @SamSykesSwears]

The things I've seen. Bodies disappearing under bloodied reindeer hooves. The life leaking out of wounds inflicted by candy cane spears. For some of us, the #WarOnChristmas never ends.

[Nancy Vandermark @classybookworm]

They say war changes a man. We were prepared for that. Nobody ever warned us about what it does to reindeer. The last great war, the #WarOnChristmas ... Son, the things I saw... the entire Claus line, gone, and nothing remained but blood, tinsel, and the smell of cookies.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

If I say its safe to ski this mountain, Captain, then its safe to ski this mountain! I mean, I'm not afraid to ski this place, I'll ski this whole fucking place! Elves don't ski. #WarOnChristmas

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

Never get out of the sleigh. Absolutely goddamn right! Unless you were goin' all the way... Santa got off the sleigh. He split from the whole fuckin' program. #WarOnChristmas

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

I love the smell of nutmeg in the morning. One time we had a hill bombed, for 12 hours. When it was all over. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' elf body. The smell, you know that nutmeg smell, the whole hill. Smelled like...victory, and nutmeg. #WarOnChristmas

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

The only way you can feel good about wasting time watching this terrible football game is if it ends in a nil nil tie. Which is very possible.

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

Way to dash my dreams, Hamilton. #TakeAKnee

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

If Lewis takes the knee during the anthem it'll be the best thing ever. Come on Lewis. #f1 #AustinGP #austinf1

[Keith Talent @Keith_Talent]

@tcheph Good point. But I don't see the paper writing scare pieces about the dudes.selling corn or salmon or cherries from pickups beside the road.