Me: “Don’t put anything on the pizza crust just yet”
Bf: “I’m not, just smoothing it out”
...
Literally 2 minutes later
...
Bf: “Was I not supposed to put the sauce on yet?”
#shitmyboyfriendsays
I didn’t think I’d ever get such a response to this little tryout! Here I am in my own self-isolation. The song that came out on top was ‘All I Ask Of You’ - ALW
I had a few drinks this afternoon following a long week at work. Pet bird poops on my sweater and immediately runs away.
Me: “Yeah, you’re right to run away after what you’ve done, mommy’s drunk!”
Bf: “You’re gonna make a great mom...”
Bf: “We can hang it over the fireway...fire chute...Santa hole!”
Me: *after several minutes of laughing* “Just to be sure, you know it’s a fireplace, right?”
Bf: “Oh yeah”
#shitmyboyfriendsays
For those looking up punctuation early on a Friday morning:
A hyphen is a mark - used to divide or to compound words.
An apostrophe is a mark ' used to indicate the omission of letters or figures.
Me: You talk about penises a lot
Bf: Should I talk about other genitals? Different types of penises? Other guys' penises? ... Vaginas???
#shitmyboyfriendsays