Kelly Friedrichsen

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

@EmilyMiels Lol sometimes they make me cry too

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Me: “Don’t put anything on the pizza crust just yet”
Bf: “I’m not, just smoothing it out”
...
Literally 2 minutes later
...
Bf: “Was I not supposed to put the sauce on yet?”
#shitmyboyfriendsays

[Andrew Lloyd Webber @OfficialALW]

I'm incredibly touched by the entire orchestra of @PhantomOpera’s creation. It's absolutely brilliant, thank you very much - ALW

[Andrew Lloyd Webber @OfficialALW]

I didn’t think I’d ever get such a response to this little tryout! Here I am in my own self-isolation. The song that came out on top was ‘All I Ask Of You’ - ALW

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Group shot! #teambirthdaygirl #OnWisconsin

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

#OnWisconsin #GoBadgers #WeWantIceCream

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Happy birthday mommy! 02/22/20 #OnWisconsin #badgers #GoBigRed

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

@totzkepaul

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

When I ask bf what is on the bird’s back:
“Oh yeah, I was making sandwiches earlier and she got in the mayo”
#shitmyboyfriendsays

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

@lern_wizerski I said we should hold 2 pieces of bread up to her and she’d be an actual turkey sandwich lol

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Bf: What do you want to do for Valentine’s Day?
Me: Badger game!
#OnWisconsin

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

I had a few drinks this afternoon following a long week at work. Pet bird poops on my sweater and immediately runs away.
Me: “Yeah, you’re right to run away after what you’ve done, mommy’s drunk!”
Bf: “You’re gonna make a great mom...”

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Bf: “We can hang it over the fireway...fire chute...Santa hole!”
Me: *after several minutes of laughing* “Just to be sure, you know it’s a fireplace, right?”
Bf: “Oh yeah”
#shitmyboyfriendsays

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

They know Thanos is the villain, right?

[BBC News (World) @BBCWorld]

"It finally struck me that the leader of my country and the free world actually enjoys comparing himself to a mass murderer" https://t.co/VLr5JNqCSC

[Merriam-Webster @MerriamWebster]

For those looking up punctuation early on a Friday morning:

A hyphen is a mark - used to divide or to compound words.
An apostrophe is a mark ' used to indicate the omission of letters or figures.

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Florida attitude 😎

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

When your pet steps in their own poop and leaves a trail of poopy footprints on your furniture...

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Bf: *laughing at his own joke* I forgot what the joke was
Me: *repeats lame joke*
Bf: *laughing harder* Goddamn I'm hilarious!

#shitmyboyfriendsays

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Bf: "What's that one movie with Christmas and the Die Hard guy?"
Me: "...Die Hard?"

#shitmyboyfriendsays

[Kelly Friedrichsen @kellyanne1776]

Me: You talk about penises a lot
Bf: Should I talk about other genitals? Different types of penises? Other guys' penises? ... Vaginas???

#shitmyboyfriendsays