Kelly Paul (Say It together... or call me KP)

Wastewater Marketer - Mizzou Master in Ag & Applied Econ. she/her/KP

[Kelly Paul (Say It together... or call me KP) @KellyPaul15]

No man will ever be as attracted to me as every mosquito this summer and that’s something I’ll just have to accept for the rest of my life.

[Kelly Paul (Say It together... or call me KP) @KellyPaul15]

Excited for next week!

[EDI (Environmental Dynamics International) @ediwastewater]

Hi, Ohio! Join Joey Green and @KellyPaul15 in Booth 617 with our reps at @PeltonEnv at @OneWaterOhio in Columbus. We'll see you there August 22-23rd!

[Dan White @atdanwhite]

Yea, it pays to be an influencer.

[Fuck You I Quit @fuckyouiquit]

That’s because men tend to go for higher paying jobs like doctor, lawyer, or software developer while women gravitate more toward lower paying jobs such as female doctor, female lawyer, or female software developer.

[zae @itszaeok]

how do high school reunions work like does the class president just pick a day and start emailing people omg

[National Park Service @NatlParkService]

You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

just learned about the iowa husband calling competition

[Dr. Nicole LePera @Theholisticpsyc]

People don't actually want advice. They already know what they should be doing. They want someone to listen and support them.

Here's how to stop giving unsolicited advice:

[hasanabi @hasanthehun]

saw that new study about walking 5mins every half hour to offset the damage done to the body by sitting all day and i guess i’m dying early instead

[ce n'est pas erica @sourhoestarter]

every culture has that one food that is just filling enveloped in a pocket of dough and that is sooo beautiful to me

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

"why don't we have fancy galas or 23-year-old art prodigies anymore" oh we absolutely still have those things, you're just way too poor to participate, same as you would have been hundreds of years ago

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

I think it’s actually very brave to go on a date when you could be murdered or they could be into crypto or something

[trash jones @jzux]

i think there is something very sweet and freeing about two people admitting to each other that they’ll always probably just be a little bit in love and that’s ok!

[michaela okland @MichaelaOkla]

If you get arrested and you go to jail and you’re wearing your contacts but like you need to take them out at night and u don’t have your glasses on you then are they gonna give you opti free or just let you be blind or will they let someone bring your glasses or no

[Kelly Paul (Say It together... or call me KP) @KellyPaul15]

@codinghater Another also very renewable source of energy is your friend having a crush on a guy that likes her back because I’m BUZZING right now.

[Nerd Girl Says @Rachael_Conrad]

Romcoms need to strive for this. Try harder. https://t.co/kMYT3Rn5CV

[Amy Wong @amyewong]

I’m a nepo baby (my parents never kicked me off their cell phone plan)

[ellie schnitt @holy_schnitt]

sometimes a really hot girl has to take a nap in the middle of the day because she is tuckered out. many do not know this!

[Sophie Vershbow @svershbow]

Last night my friend’s boyfriend was taking a photo of our group and a gen Z girl walked by, grabbed the phone out of his hand, took the best photo we’ve ever seen, handed the phone back, and walked away.

[trash jones @jzux]

don’t worry nobody remembers that weird thing you said the other day. but they do remember that other thing you didn’t even notice