Kelsey King

if it involves pasta or dogs or chinchillas, I’m in

[Kelsey King @kelsrking]

I AM OBSESSED WITH MY WEDDING AND MY HUSBAND AND MY DRESS AND MY VENUE

[get busy living or get busy ryan @ryanmatttheu]

this is the best day on twitter since a submarine exploded

[Dadman Standing @dadmann_walking]

if you eat 50 Reese's trees that's 200 grams of protein. It's not difficult to get more protein in your diet.

[One Awkward Mom @oneawkwardmom]

Sorry I can’t make it, it’s dark by 6pm and I have an astigmatism and also I don’t want to.

[erika @yeeeerika]

pasta is my favorite antidepressant

[John Wicker Park @phonybone]

my bad

[Lyle 🏝️ @_FromTheIsland]

I want him to tally the votes for the whole country

[Billy Scafuri @BillyScafuri]

I made a sticker you can wear tomorrow.

[Amy Schneider @Jeopardamy]

How did we all, collectively, decide to disrupt our circadian rhythms at precisely the moment we’re trying to decide what to do for the next four years?

[doomer @uncledoomer]

this is my electoral map prediction for tuesday because this country is COOKED

[Karly Matthews @karlymatthews_]

God forbid a woman has hobbies

[Sinethemba.🇿🇦 @cnehshuga]

This would’ve gone platinum on tumblr

[Greg Wyshynski @wyshynski]

Lightning and Hurricanes postponed by lightning and hurricanes

[Sukhada @appadappajappa]

Wasn’t ready to cry over this 🥺

[Steph @stephanitely21]

“Worm Regards”

[YIMBYLAND @YIMBYLAND]

These should be banned nationwide

[Admiral Snaccbar 🐙 @Chris_Mench]

Serving shrimp with the tail still on when it’s already mixed into something (pasta, rice, etc) is insane.