Kelley Mathys

cat lady and tv aficionado. she/her.

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

Find me here if you want

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

UNDER CAPITALISM, PEOPLE ARE NOT ENTITLED TO CLEAN WATER BUT DATA CENTERS ARE.

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

“Do you think you’re superior for not using AI in your work?” Thank you for that beautiful question. Yes, I do.

[Edgar Allen Poe @allenakinkunle]

📌

[maddie @madsssagascar]

if someone ran a marathon and someone else drove 26 miles i wouldnt congratulate the driver just because he ended up at the destination

[Kayla Ancrum ✨Mostly Updates✨ @KaylaAncrum]

I always think the phrase “The studio has tricked me, Juliard trained Val Kilmer, into being here” whenever I see an actor who is way more serious than the project that I’m watching them in, and despite this, is putting on the performance of a lifetime.

[Katherine Argent @effthealgorithm]

Search is full of ads and wrong answers. Every other email is an ad. Prime Video charges you and shows ads. Paramount? Ads. Peacock? YouTube? Hulu? Ads followed by more ads. Netflix full of ads. Meta and X, every other thing is an ad. Pinterest is nothing but ads. AI is in everything. AI finishes sentences incorrectly and won’t stop. AI reads your email and search history to target you with more ads. Every time you open an app or visit a site there’s an update making it worse. In a hurry? First, click here to agree to terms you don’t have time to read and must accept. You need an account to do that. Change your temporary password. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email and enter that code. Now use a passkey. Your password is too simple to remember. Change it. No, not like that. Now log on. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email for a code… Welcome back! We’ve updated our terms of service and privacy policy (you have none). Subscribe to the site. Subscribe to Netflix. Subscribe to toilet paper. Subscribe to these groceries. Pay a membership fee for the right to subscribe then tip your driver who delivers the subscriptions your membership lets you subscribe to. Time to work? We’ve got to update your laptop and will slow down everything you do until you agree to update. But first, click here to agree. Update installed — your laptop’s broken now. It doesn’t matter, since your boss just replaced you with AI. Go to your phone to complain on social media. Wait, your phone needs an update so we can add more AI. Click here. Oh sorry, your phone can’t handle this update. Now it’s useless. Go get the newest phone. Here’s a text from a friend, an email, a voice mail they left three days ago but you didn’t see until now because of sync problems with the cloud. It’s their GoFundMe. Their MLM. Their Patreon. Never mind, you didn’t respond to their text within 9 minutes and now you’re no longer friends. They blocked you. Make new friends. Download this app to find people in your area. In your neighborhood. On your street. Two doors down from you. Do you know this person yet, we think you’d get along. You need an account to use this app. That username is taken. Enter a password. Not that one, you used it on another site. You need to be connected to WiFi to download the app. Allow the app to connect to other devices on your network. Allow the app to access your contacts, know your precise location, store your credit card details. Oops, sorry, we got hacked now all that info is available on the web. There’s a class action suit. You can join. It’ll take a decade to get your $3.73 share of the ten billion settlement. We’ll send it via PayPal or deposit it to your bank, just tell us those details. Oh no, another hack. That info is circulating now, too. Here’s a spam call, a spam email, a spam text. Why are you angry? Why are you talking about getting rid of your phone? Why don’t you like AI, it lets us make all of this easier? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? This is progress. You’ll be left behind. Do you want to be left behind? Do you???

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

@loveinyourattic Jake Choi came out as sexually fluid and said he figured it out after acting in a Queer film https://t.co/u6Bw1mSpNL

[What Chaos! @WhatChaosShow]

Rangers bad because of gay?

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

A braCAT

[The Sickos CBB Committee @SickosCBB]

So, a friend of mine has a family bracket tournament every year. Everyone participates, including the family cat.

The cat has rules: animals over humans, cats over non-cats, big cats over little cats.

The cat has won several years.

[summer 🪼🫍🫧 @31frankel]

women’s team usa should get to recreate the end of bottoms with the men’s

[kaylaaa 🩷 hudcon down @holyhudcon]

the high i’m getting from this gif will last me weeks

[kera @2inthesinbin]

I just had to share I died laughing

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

@theactorbat *cough cough* https://t.co/nXNNTsqWW4

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

I'm watching real hockey but to balance it out, I'm reading Heated Rivalry fanfiction at the same time

[🤠 @heavensbvnny]

Media ADHD: "Ooh, look a squirrel! Let's go ride bikes!"

Real ADHD: "I am currently ruining my own life by refusing to perform a 3-minute task that would solve 90% of my anxiety.

I am fully aware of this. I am screaming internally. I physically cannot make my body stand up and do it. And yes it as stupid to me as it is to you.

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

SNL needs to bring a version of this back for Connor Storrie's episode
https://t.co/XTSCiTdNgk

[Kelley Mathys @kemathys]

@hudsonwupdates Every time I think I've watched all his shorts, another one suddenly appears on the internet. HOW ARE THERE MORE?

[Shooter McGavin @ShooterMcGavin]

Kids today will never get to experience falling asleep on the couch and being woke up at 2:30 am by Michael Bolton and Celine Dion