kermitfromthemuppets68

Just a Kid From a Small Town Band

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

I go to the University of San Andreas State and every night when I get back to my dorm my random roommate is crawling around, chanting gibberish, in nothing but mis-match socks. I confronted him one time and he just started jerking off. What do I do? #cbtm #sendy

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

For the past week I’ve been setting up trail cams in downtown Smartsville, hoping to catch something cool on tape, so far all I’ve seen is 2 homeless dudes having sexual intercourse, and small Indian man who lives in the dumpster outside Bingos Diner. #depremoldu #ThatstherobotG

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

@JoaquinSnatches Well statistically that’s an improbability considering exodus amounts of creatures whom roam, therefore it’s guaranteed someone enjoys “geeking” on a scale so exodus, you couldn’t fathom. Not to mention the exodus amounts of beings, meaning there is an exodus amount of combos

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Chiefs < Eagles < Panthers.
@bryceyoung Will bring Glory to CLT for once and for all. Or I will chop off my left nut, deep fry it, and feed it to my pet chameleon. #Raisetheroof #Itsgettingchilly #chipotlesucks #geturboyperk

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Taylor Swift, more like Gaylor Swift. #TushPush #Bergers #IdlikeasliceofthatcakeSIR #GoofyGoober

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

My favorite movie scene of all time is when the Lorax grabs is ass and floats away. #canyousuckit #ihavenothing #omg50dollars

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Im praying Saquon runs up to the club level, trucks the absolute shit out of Taylor Swift then hit the griddy back into the locker room. #fortheonetime #hedidntwantto #Scot

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Whoever invented AP Gov can literally kiss my buttocks #screwfidle #spankyshores #expiredpoon

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

@JoaquinSnatches Obviously dumbass, your point?

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

@TateTheTalisman Cheaper and Faster transactions than bitcoin. Made in the USA. Promoted by Trump. Will take over global bank transactions, pumping trillions into the coin.

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Almost died today because my uber driver flipped our car. #Notgeek #FudgeMe #StinkleNut

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

@JoaquinSnatches Who is u, the nutsack professor?? #DingleCracker #MustyNoodle

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Retweet if horny #5BigBooms #CheeseWhiz

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Million dollar idea… we take a bunch of orphans and make them duke it out, naked, 1 on 1 style in a ring. Winner gets adopted. Livestream it and sell pay-per-view to unregistered pervs on the dark web?? #VanishiSwa #HairyMentos

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Last week I saw a little Chinese man pissing on the street, some kid around the corner threw a half eaten Dave’s Single at him #doyouknowdawei #ShinyNugget

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

100% got busted by my pops while I was high last night. Not recommended… #BenDover #ChocolateSponge

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

#HoomanTV is just as funny now as he was 6 years ago!!! Retweet if you think his pranks are faked!! #Busted #CarmelSnake

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

I only believe in two things in this whole word, the First Amendment and Boobs. #imbobbymom

[kermitfromthemuppets68 @kermitheninja]

Thank goodness Trump is back in office soon, hopefully he’ll ban paper straws and ban only fans #firstpost #imthewizard