Katherine Dalton

I mainly tweet rap lyrics and my most bothersome thoughts. No one is making you follow me.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

#inauguration

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Just heard Fiona Apple sing "Frosty the Snowman" on the radio and I'm not really sure what to think about anything anymore. I am shaken.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

*listening to "Kanye" by @TheChainsmokers
"Do you think Kanye is somewhere in rehab listening to this song?" - @mandrewdalton

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

I miss the old Kanye

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

"My hell would have kites. Kites are sky demons."

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Me: did you fart?
@mandrewdalton: *leans down and sniffs at butt level* yep.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

I would like to retract previous statement - experience was like being inside a snow globe of allergy nightmares.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Finally found a quick and easy way to get all the dog hair out of my car: drive really fast with the windows down.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Did anyone drive to see sunsets somewhere pretty before Instagram?

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Stages of dishwasher grief
Month 1: this isn't so bad
Month 2: I wonder how much a dishwasher costs
Month 3: NO ONE SHOULD LIVE THIS WAY

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

My ability to eat cake for breakfast after over eating cake last night is like a mom forgetting the pain of childbirth to have a 2nd baby.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

An actual college student said to me "I want a vintage ipod so bad" so I guess I'm old now

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

SIA & KENDRICK ON A TRACK TOGETHER GOD IS REAL

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Opens front door to find giant spider on porch.
Slams door closed.
Prepares self for Emily Dickinson lifestyle.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

"Oh no. When she starts thinking about birthday cake she's basically useless until she gets birthday cake" - Ben Wyatt. Too relatable.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Where can you find sweatpants off the highway at 5 am? Driving to a morning mountain shoot and deeply regretting my decision to wear shorts.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

@emilykatherineD girl I wish I had made it up but nope chocolate on the forehead. How did it get there? A mystery only God may know.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

@mandrewdalton I'm in love with my city b**ch I sleep in my hat

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

Found what I thought was a new mole on my forehead. Got concerned about sun damage. Nope no worries just chocolate.

[Katherine Dalton @khern3]

"I've been craving salt lately" -me
"My grandma craved salt before she died." -@tonilawrimore