Let's normalize telling people, 'It seems you don't have the capacity to love me in the ways I crave and need, so let's not continue this, I deserve better,' and leave it at that.
i dislike being around people who lack emotional intelligence and self regulation. it just irks my soul. if you cannot see things outside of yourself and how you’re harming others, you will never evolve. intention has nothing to do with impact
No one teaches you how to admit you might be addicted to the hope of someone. Nor how to stop being loyal to someone who isn’t emotionally equipped to receive what you’re offering. Some part of you knows that. Let me explain…
Hace poco mi marido me dijo algo que se me quedó muy grabado.
Me dijo: «No estoy aquí para controlarte. No soy tu padre, soy tu pareja. Eres completamente libre de tomar tus propias decisiones. Solo quiero que tengas claro que cada elección trae consecuencias. Si decides hacer algo que dañe lo que hemos construido juntos, esa responsabilidad será tuya».
También añadió: «Siempre te voy a decir cuando algo me duele o cruza un límite mío, porque eso es parte de una comunicación sana. Pero si, aún sabiendo dónde está la línea, decides seguir cruzándola, entonces nunca estuviste protegiendo realmente esta relación».
Y la verdad es que así es exactamente como suena la responsabilidad en una pareja.
painful truth: u MUST develop a strong opinion of yourself, because if u don't, somebody else will do it for u. and trust me... some ppl will reduce your entire existence to their mood, their jealousy, their insecurity, or one mistake u made three years ago. don't let strangers become the author of your identity. damn...jeeezzz .
Before you argue with someone ask yourself, is this person mentally mature enough to grasp the concept of different perspectives?, If not there is no point to argue.
According to psychology some people will never reach out and speak to you again because they don't have the maturity to cope with the fact that they did you wrong and you didn't deserve it. Since they lack accountability, they will create a made-up narrative about you so they don't feel bad about themselves
You suffer because you try too hard to control. You cling to people, outcomes, ideas about yourself. You take it all so seriously and it makes you anxious and stressed. Release and let go. Live life the way you would hold sand. Not with a closed fist, but an open palm.
The obsession with wanting people to regret losing you is insane. You’re not that special. People lose people every day and keep living. Heal from the ego that needs to be missed, chased, or mourned to feel valuable. Your job is not to become somebody’s punishment. Your job is to grow, move on, and build a life so full that their regret is no longer your concern.
When I head to Washington, I will be the first woman in Congress with a science PhD. That matters. At a time when science is under attack, Congress needs more leaders who understand the value of evidence-based decision-making.
I finally understand what Machiavelli meant when he said, “Never play fair in a game where others cheat.” It doesn’t mean become evil. It means stop being naive. Stop bringing honesty to people who study manipulation, stop giving access to people who weaponize closeness, and stop expecting clean hands from people who already showed you they’ll throw dirt. Sometimes wisdom is not revenge. Sometimes wisdom is learning the rules of the room before the room uses your goodness against you.
The neurodivergent ick when you realize mid-convo that correcting them is pointless because they'd need self-awareness and emotional intelligence to even process that they're wrong.
You can't build an honest relationship with people who lie to themselves. You can't reach people who only see the version of you in their minds. You can't communicate with people who are always trying to one-up you. Distance yourself from such dynamics and prioritize reciprocity.
read more books. read to escape reality. read to understand reality. read to challenge what you believe. read to think better. read to write better. read to argue better. read to know yourself. read to build something. a single book can completely rewire your brain.
Human approval is unstable. Someone may praise you today and criticize you tomorrow, so it's wiser to anchor your life in deeper principles than in other people's opinions.
You could be the person that reaches out first, have meaningful conversations that add value to their life, be a consistent friend, be honest, make effort, offer love kindness and a presence and not get any of it in return because most ppl aren’t capable of seeing beyond themselves,
But that shouldn’t change who you are, your warmth, or make you bitter, you just have to add and remove who is worthy.