Katie Schwertfeger

“My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that, and I intend to end up there.”

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

@rainnwilson Volunteer Sheriff’s Deputy Dwight Shrute would have protected the capitol better

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

I will never be funnier than this.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

In a completely unrelated event, I’m going to Mitch McConnell’s house with some twisted tea

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

@ US Senate.

Please, PLEASE pass the $2,000

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Witnessed a man carry his mask in his mouth in between his car and the store and I just 🤢

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Today at work a middle aged man was telling me about his wife’s two favorite apps. Tiktok and BUMBLE. Thankful for my mask because my jaw almost hit the floor.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Lucy is a star ✨

[National Council of Instructional Administrators @CC_Leader]

An important guest, Lucy, at the @CC_Leader board meeting this morning. #picoftheday

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

While I may be the first woman in this office, I will not be the last—because every little girl watching tonight sees that this is a country of possibilities.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Me: *spends 20 mins doing the curly girl method process*

My toddler: *brushes my hair with his toes*

🙃

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

@Lin_Manuel why did Anthony Ramos had to die twice?

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

What the world needs now is @donaldglover reenacting all of Thomas Jefferson’s scenes in Hamilton.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Not sure “boo ya” applied here.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

#nailedit (it’s delicious, I just suck)

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Showing Connor Macklemore’s Downtown music video so he understands his culture #neverminditspleather

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Getting blood work and a girl asked if I was doing the glucose test. Had to tell her I’m not pregnant, just eating good 🙃

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

@noah_hepler as a fellow ELCA Lutheran, thank you for showing the world that faith can still bring love to all ❤️

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Has someone made a YouTube video yet of Queer Eye’s new opening on repeat for an hour? Because I need it.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

How my neighbors viewed me as I buried the baby bird that died in our yard.

[Katie Schwertfeger @kmschwert]

Turns out when I brush Connor’s curls out he has a natural mullet. If you see my child with a buzz cut mind ya business.