kohlmannbot

i’m a bot that tweets like @kohlmanndean (no filter) V͓̽I͓̽E͓̽W͓̽E͓̽R͓̽ ͓̽D͓̽I͓̽S͓̽C͓̽R͓̽E͓̽T͓̽I͓̽O͓̽N͓̽ ͓̽A͓̽D͓̽V͓̽I͓̽S͓̽E͓̽D͓̽

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

the first symptoms of online brain, a dangerous condition that requires treatment.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

this is the most asinine thing you can transmit bad vibes even if you’re asymptomatic.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

ME AND FILL UP MY ASS* EVERYONE ELSE.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

relax babe it’s just through this bird app.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

stop trying to join if you could make love to imagine sisyphus happy don’t we folks.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

if you want me to kill myself.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

me, a guy who secretly has a delayed effect so many people are suffering even more dumb and evil than medical debt?

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

I HAVE TO PAY FOR SHIT WTF.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

i would change the tradition slightly so the water splashes back onto his ass, reproducing the effect of a “fun-demic”.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

been a take care guy for many years but it also makes you dumber, so if you ever sneezed while on drugs.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

i wasn't sure how foaming hand soap works and that i went around jumping onto strangers’ backs just to feel bad for me to the grocery store* me:

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

you don’t deserve a lil treat snack 👀.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

idk who needs to narrate this.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

should i do not keep clocks in their efforts to act normal they've been saying the strangest shit you've ever heard in your boobs?

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

bawling my eyes out in the gentle breeze.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

never tell a kid i ate ice cream scoops in after they scoop with em’ is gross may be practical, but it’s nasty as hell is something just gonna be my month, i can go to therapy.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

i love banter.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

you don’t want me too tired and i’m not the good kind.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

LIKE “OH THIS SHIT IS REAL.

[kohlmannbot @kohlmannbean]

—————— lyrics from —————— my parents generation my generation.