Kount Rockula

Rabble-rouser and perpetrator of ignominious shenanigans!

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

https://t.co/HujQA2hAhh

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

wtf is happening at the #ausopen ?! @ChrissieEvert *isn't* talking nonstop and during points in the @serenawilliams @naomiosaka match. pleasantly shocked. tennis awesome, thanks for letting it speak for itself

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

what am I saying -- @ChrissieEvert assuredly talks about herself during commercial breaks #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

I imagine @ChrissieEvert has a bucket full of live eels, ham cubes and raw garlic cloves she slurps gleefully from during commercial breaks #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

please @espn just mute @ChrissieEvert 's mic for the love of all that is good and right and true #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

try this experiment: umute the #ausopen for 1 second periodically and keep track of how many times @ChrissieEvert is talking. I'm seriously doing this. It's EVERY FUCKING TIME BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T SHUT UP

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

when did tennis commentating turn into "I'll just talk about myself and other bullshit no one cares about nonstop and ruin the whole fucking whole match"?!

Oh right, when @ChrissieEvert started #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

have to watch #ausopen on mute because @ChrissieEvert won't SHUT THE FUCK UP

NO ONE CARES where you took a goddamn dump 40 years ago. just SHUT UP

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

@ChrissieEvert STOP talking during points AT LEAST. when the ball is in play SHUT UP #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

please @ChrissieEvert just SHUT UP. you RUIN every match you commentate with your nonstop blather. for the love of god just SHUT THE FUCK UP #AusOpen @espn

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

gonna get a LOT of mileage out of MINIMAL FINGERS, as it were #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

minimal fingers or minimally exceptional?

#ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

I guess one is good
#minimalfingers #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

day 1, first hour of watching #ausopen and BAM: MINIMAL FINGERS

should be an amazing 2 weeks!!!

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

@patrickmcenroe just apologized to Kukushkin for mistaking his new gf for his ex wife but not for MINIMAL FINGERS #ausopen @espn #limbdifference

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

MINIMAL FINGERS

#believe #ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

minimal fingers #minimalhitler

#ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

MINIMAL FINGERS

#ausopen

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

never forget: @patrickmcenroe MINIMAL FINGERS
I think he has MINIMAL BRAIN CELLS #ausopen #limbdifference #minimalpenis

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

ectrodactyly ectodermal dysplasia syndrome? nah, MINIMAL FINGERS

https://t.co/eLeCAViGDc

@espn @PatrickMcEnroe #ausopen @ausopen @guardian

[Kount Rockula @kount_rockula]

@PatrickMcEnroe just said MINIMAL FINGERS!!! oh fuck me I'm absolutely DEAD

MINIMAL FINGERS!!! THINK OF THAT!!!

@espn @AustralianOpen #AusOpen