Jacob Smith

Drunk sports fan and Pokémon TCG player

[Brett Kollmann @BrettKollmann]

@BCNOgi You never watched Boston Scott against the Giants.

[Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton]

Maybe Vance doesn't know this history because it's in one of the books his administration banned.

The difference between Watergate and now is that back then, Republicans actually did something about a law-breaking president. Today, they only roll over for their cult leader.

[Thomas Massie @RepThomasMassie]

The irony of Republicans controlling all branches of government while

bankrupting the country, starting a war, sending money to fraudulent programs, violating the Constitution, giving corporations immunity...

but arguing that the biggest problem we have is “stolen elections.”

[BetMGM 🦁 @BetMGM]

Jalen Hurts.

[Jacob Smith @Krypsizzle]

@eezy_taughtme @tzenes @PokeDuelsTikTok Yeah 2/5 people in my house play pokemon. Which is 400,000 per million. So NAIC should be at my house in 2028. Makes sense to me

[Jac Carter @Jace_TCG]

If you don’t celebrate your friend’s first day 2 like they won the whole thing then you’re a LOSER

[Wu Tang is for the Children @WUTangKids]

Toronto @BlueJays for the win

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

I think it’s funny how Christians say “god loves you unconditionally” but then make up all kinds of conditions.

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

Things most Americans agree on:

Groceries cost too much.

Tariffs suck and make no sense.

Congress and Presidents shouldn’t trade stocks.

The debt is a mess.

The border should be secure, but legal immigration is good.

Endless wars are stupid, especially ones that nobody wants and have never been explained.

Americans are exhausted.

AI is like my new best friend that also might be trying to take my job, my ability to think for myself, and my humanity in the process. Yo like I love you, but WTF, but I still love you.

Diversity is actually awesome! The opposite is boring AF.

Canadians are super fucking cool.

Mexicans are chill.

Putin isn’t a good guy looking out for America’s best interest. Rocky IV and Miracle are great movies.

Good neighbors are a blessing.

Freedom of religion and coexistence without having to blow each other up is probably a good idea.

We all question, are we alone in the universe?

We all fuck up along the way.

Epstein didn’t hang himself.

The Trumps and Epstein were best friends for decades. It’s like Bert trying to tell us Ernie was just an acquaintance in the same social scene on Sesame Street back in the day.

The Cowboys suck. Go Birds!

Things we’re told to fight about:

Me.
Laptop.
Vaccines.
Transgenders in sports.
Pronouns.

That’s the joke.

[Jacob Smith @Krypsizzle]

@3YearLetterman Damn coach, you’ve e been around 9 years already?? This 3rd&4th graders you were coaching back then have gone D1 by now. Crazy to think

[That Hurts @That_Hurts]

Actually hilarious comparing Jalen vs Maye their first two seasons as starters.

More Passing yards when we had Jalen Reagor listed as our WR1 😭

[The Vigilant Fox 🦊 @VigilantFox]

Neil deGrasse Tyson: “Whatever [the next outbreak] is, we ain’t ready for it. We still have anti-vaxxers running around.”

“I don’t trust scientists. I saw a YouTube video, so I’m not going to take it.” (mocking)

“I don’t want you to ever forget this story.”

“20,000 years ago, we’re in the cave. Do you know what the life expectancy was?”

Shannon Sharpe: “10 years? 15 years?”

Neil deGrasse Tyson: “30. Half of everyone born was dead before they were 30.”

Shannon Sharpe: “Wow!!!”

Neil deGrasse Tyson: “Fast forward to 1840… everyone born in the world was dead by the age of 35. We gained five years of life expectancy. And every one of them ate organic, breathed clean air… Science matters here.”

“We’ve doubled the life expectancy with antibiotics, vaccines, and sanitation. The three biggest forces operating on our longevity. So to come around and say I don’t need vaccines because I’m not getting sick, that’s like saying, why are you using dandruff shampoo? You don’t have dandruff.”

Shannon Sharpe: “Well, I don’t want to get it.”

Neil deGrasse Tyson: “That’s my point. If you’re successful, people think you don’t need it when that’s what’s creating the ongoing success in the first place.”

[Democrats @TheDemocrats]

@StephenM shut up you ugly fuck

[Kaitlan Collins @kaitlancollins]

Thomas Massie in his concession speech: "While gas is almost $5 a gallon and diesel is almost $6, they're talking about this big ballroom...It looks like the Roman Empire. I see a few analogies there..."

[Barry @BarryOnHere]

Best opponents LeBron or Jordan faced in a playoff series (based on @bball_ref Simple Rating System):

11.35 - 2017 Warriors
11.04 - 2026 Thunder
10.38 - 2016 Warriors
10.01 - 2015 Warriors
9.30 - 2008 Celtics
9.06 - 1986 Celtics
8.35 - 2007 Spurs
8.00 - 2014 Spurs

Really difficult to say who faced tougher opponents. It's just so tough!!!!

[Jeff Nadu @JeffNadu]

Gas prices at highest rates in years, airlines going out of business, food is out of control high. Everything costs more in general, constantly at war and involved in conflicts. Donald Trump’s America.

[gummy | First time reading AFFC @gummyuy]

RIP robert baratheon you would’ve loved sports betting