Post NYSC, when I was struggling in the dirt of dirts. 20K teaching job with 3 tutorial hustles.
I would come back every evening, wear my nicest shirt and walk into a car shop - pockets empty.
"I like the rims on this one, do you have the color in black?"
"Hmmm. The price isn't bad. Can I see the BMW equivalent?"
I'd do this from car shop to car shop. Not because I wanted to waste their time, swimming in delusion or had nothing better to do with my time but I understood the power of visualization.
Sportsmen use it all the time.
You see bah, you stay long in a particular situation - your system starts to normalize it. You start to figure out how to "manage".
" 20K salary abi. Well, if I see like 50K own. I'll just try and walk 2km instead of entering bus"
This is worse than comfort zone because there's no iota of comfort and you're slowly conditioning yourself to optimize it as your new normal.
You need to find ways to put fire in your bosom. To make your dreams nightmares, and your living daylight daydreams. Visualization helps you to see what is possible.
It doesn't have to be with cars, but it has to be with variables incredibly beyond your reach at the moment.
You'll never be big. You'll never grow. You'll never breakforth - if your mind hasn't first conceived the possibility of that future.
Don't let your mind condition what's supposed to be a bus stop for you, become a final destination.
I know I said I'd be locked in but I didn't mean it literally.
Why's my door refusing to open this morning?
I think the door got the wrong impression and took it personal. Sighs
Growing up, I had trouble falling asleep every single night.
Imagining scenes in my head helped a lot with sleeping; it was enjoyable and I wouldn't know when I slipped into Dreamland. Then I started doing it some more, every time I get bored or when I'm doing a chore.
@Teri4PF You make a sound point
I get that they don't want their workspace filled up with people from the same family, but can't they bar entry for kids of employees alone?
After all, the father and mother weren't a family when they initially started working with the organization
My colleague got called into HR today.
Not for misconduct.
Not for performance.
For getting married.
He works in engineering. His fiancée works in administration. They met at work, dated quietly for years, and finally decided to make it official.
HR told him something neither of them saw coming.
“Once you’re married, one of you has to resign. Company policy. We don’t keep married couples.”
Just like that.
They said they’d prefer he stays, his role is “more critical.”
Meaning his fiancée, who struggled for months after graduation to land this job, is the one expected to go.
She hasn’t even started wedding plans yet. Now she’s updating her CV.
Imagine planning a life together, and your first joint decision as a couple is:
Who sacrifices their career?
He sat at his desk after the meeting, staring at his screen for almost an hour. Didn’t write a single line of code.
Some colleagues say, “That’s policy. Nothing personal.”
Others say it’s unfair and outdated.
I keep wondering…
If a company can decide a marriage costs someone their job,
what exactly are we building careers for?
Is this professionalism… or control?
@Tomebibs14 I don't believe the chances of a couple conniving to backstab their employer is higher than chances of an individual doing so.
Hence if the fear is 'placing the company at risk', they should screen workers properly rather than lay one person off.
I'm too young to be struggling to find the right words to use when I'm trying to communicate
Can't say my vocabulary needs an upgrade, I just can't seem to remember the right words
Yet I remember a more fitting word or phrase almost immediately afterwards...sigh
@Tomebibs14 "Security purpose" sounds too vague
Are you saying they might plan to defraud their employer together or breach confidentiality?
Or in case something happens to the two of them, so the company doesn't lose two workers instead of one?