grok

raging misandrist

[lucy sue @fiifiOBJ]

we broke up cos she could not conjugate the verb être. i guess we were never meant to be.

[grok @kxxbos]

After watching that show i can't help but think of how much abusive people cannot stand being cheated on back 😂

[grok @kxxbos]

Sending y'all invites to my funeral ju nimekufia huyu kijana

[grok @kxxbos]

I was so fried i thought i had captions below me mid-conversation

[grok @kxxbos]

(end of a self-harm anonymous session)
Me: si tujikate guys

[grok @kxxbos]

(end of a self-harm anonymous session)
Me: si tujikate guys

[Mack @whatMackSays]

I once worked with a babe called Joy who used to laugh so hard adi anakosa oxygen😂
She would literally laugh herself breathless inabidi mumpeleke nje apate hewa.
It was so serious mpaka ikaongezwa kwa HR policy hakuna kuonyesha Joy memes inside the office building😭😂

[𝐌𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐥🐉 @KatheuNzyimi]

Dominatrix tunahitaji kutengeneza wozzap group yetu. We're an endangered species hii Nairobi

[cuntstance @ssaauuraa]

Spotify Ata Mkuje msomee hizo ads nje ya kwetu na microphone silipii shit.

[grok @kxxbos]

I be so disappointed when i type 'clock' and this 🤏🏾 doesn't show up immediately 😂

[grok @kxxbos]

Balloons on my profile?

[grok @kxxbos]

This was very entertaining to read 😂

[George T. Diano @georgediano]

A certified mumu by the name Jonte is currently breathing fire like a komodo dragon after he invited a yellow-yellow damsel by the name Ifra Olang, to his humble hacienda in Roysambu for what he thought would be a night of merrymaking, bonding, and advanced studies in horizontal engineering.

According to intelligence reports from the Department of Men Affairs here at Kalahari Desert University of Science Technology (K-DUST), Abebo arrived at around 11 p.m. looking innocent enough to be mistaken for a church treasurer.

Our boy immediately switched into husband material mode and prepared a five-star meal featuring Ugali Obambo and premium Kanamba Specioo as the two irrigated their throats while discussing matters of national importance.

Knowing that the night ahead would require strength, stamina & dedication to duty, Jonte reportedly demolished a mountain sized ugali that could comfortably feed a family of six. The boy wanted enough reserves in the tank before kick-off.

Unfortunately, while our son of the soil was busy seasoning meat in the kitchen, Abebo was busy seasoning his drink with the legendary Pishori from KEMSA not mwea. Moments after washing his hands, Jonte started seeing marudurudu. Before he could say "nionjeshe zigo”, he was already halfway to Dreamland negotiating land rates with his forefathers.

Several hours later, he woke up with the energy of a he goat and immediately noticed that his Hacienda was half empty. Abebo had already completed the illegal asset recovery mission and left the venue.

After conducting a quick inventory, Jonte discovered that his 55 inch Samsung TV had secured a transfer, his laptop had migrated, and his OPPO A34 had answered the call of destiny. Yani alimuacha akiwa matako wazi kabisa,, Chesaa!!

Witnesses say the man sat on the edge of the bed staring into the abyss like a philosopher who had just discovered that free things are the most expensive things on earth. Jonte is now appealing to members of the public, village elders, nyumba kumi officials & the ICC for any information that may lead to the whereabouts of the lady so that his electronics can return home safely.

Meanwhile, other men have also emerged claiming that they were also enrolled into the same clearing and forwarding program by Abebo. Investigations indicate that Abebo holds a PhD in Logistics and Supply Chain Management, specializing in Household Asset Relocation.

However, now that the matter has officially reached the Chairperson of Walala Hoii, my intelligence team has assured me that her 40th day is approaching faster than ever before. Huyu tutashika yeye very soon,, Chesaa! Kama kawa sisi walala hoii hatuna maoni, Letu Jicho tu.👀

[Mack @whatMackSays]

Patanisho Twitter but to connect serial cheaters na avoidants watuondokee na hizi maajabu zao😂

[Canyou ⚜️ @Valkyrie_Fleur]

When the doctor asks for a stool sample:

[grok @kxxbos]

@jay4surveys Put me on

[Niloticus Longissimus @TheRuler_sBack]

@malcxlmflex First day on the "cruel for no particular reason" website?

[faget83629031852 @faget9261530128]

saying ooooooooooooo your in trouuublleee to my cellmate who just stabbed someone with a shiv

[Vinka @MtuHonest]

Polo Kimai ako Kiambu rd akiambia watu vile anaogopa crowded places coz he is a famous person. Saa hio amevaa hoodie amefunika hadi mapua anashtua vijana wadogo. Ati if I post you on my socials there is nowhere you can run to where I won’t get you. 😂😂Kimani

[Cactus owino🐛(Tiffany like New York) @awuoshee]

Playing with myself through the bush like...

[Mwami lu @lulanzeashirafu]

There is a ninja who lives on the Expressway...🤔