Lance Albritton

Bio? Shouldn't this be auto-bio?

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

Greater odds: seeing Bigfoot or a plane leaving LGA on time?? #SouthwestAirlines #hurryupandwait

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

@MinskysPizza you have a chance to turn a negative additional 45 minute wait into a positive with a breadstick or other token appetizer, but you're not. I suggest you read, The Power of Moments

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

Changed my flights and Southwest airlines waived the fees and/or charges of fare difference. What an airline!!! Now, if they could just figure how to board from the back of the plane..#SouthwestAirlines #southwest

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

Anyone can fall in love on a floating beach in Thailand. I want to see them put together a book case from IKEA and then see how much they like each other. #bachelor2019

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

@aLongShot @Desert_Classic Awesome to watch! Congratulations on the win and the hard work and dedication you've done to make it happen.

[NFL Network @nflnetwork]

Yes, @Colts QB Andrew Luck is a fan of the @CaptAndrewLuck Twitter account 😂

(via @MJAcostaTV)

#UpToTheMinute

[Josh Hawley @HawleyMO]

Loved seeing the good men of Rockhurst HS (my alma mater) in town for #MarchForLife2019! Honor to meet you guys

[Andrew Pollack @AndrewPollackFL]

What/who failed my daughter:

•Dem policies
•Dem Sheriff
•Dem Super intendant
•Dem school board
•Dem teachers union

Now Nancy Pelosi is saying that if the Dems take back the House they will take away guns to honor Parkland victims

From a victims dad, go to hell Dems #FixIt

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

#NewProfilePic

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

@DemetriMartin We need to go!

[Demetri Martin ([email protected]) @DemetriMartin]

I've posted this before, but since it's palindrome week I'm posting it again - a 500-word palindrome I wrote. Enjoy?

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

i have moments when i wish i was smarter.... tonight is one of those moments

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

late night bowls of cereal.....always a good idea

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

@rogwasson among other things....

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

Lightning close = scary....lightning at a distance = cool

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

@obiwancanolli it wasn't bad....but i expect pixar to give me a comedy...not drama

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

the movie UP......kinda got me down

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

i can't believe i am saying this after 10 years....but.... i am watching the NBA again.... still not getting a tattoo

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

for those of you looking for a funny website...that might also help your marketing... www.helpmybusiness.com.... look no further :-)

[Lance Albritton @lancealbritton]

Let's GO Yankees!