amythest ✨

she/her. satire account. Je déteste ça ici ✨♉️♉️♌️✨

[amythest ✨ @laskan_witch]

Don’t confuse my unwillingness to interact with you as a sign of having beef, chances are your spirit snitched on you and my intuition caught on.

[The Lesbian Pervert @babyknifespice]

i’m sorry i called your cat a faggot it’s just that he’s a little faggot i mean look at him!!!!

[Trick Forever @khiazmos]

I like Hunter Biden because he isn’t one of those guys that gets sober and then pretends being a degenerate isn’t insanely fun

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

books are amazing because a stranger from 200 years ago can still ruin your afternoon emotionally.

[s @yoongienthusias]

men do it all the time, live your truth queen

[Kye @GxldSociety]

Nasty spirited people not liking you is divine protection.

[The Ginger Swindler @lilydsmith]

coworker asked me if ive been “seeing those hunter biden tweets” baby i can recite them. i pledge allegiance to them.

[ً @gnosticse]

dirty talk got too intense and i accidentally called him a retard

[Kam @PatsKam]

"I have a boyfriend" doesn't stop them.
"I’m married" doesn't stop them.

However, “I love luxury and expensive things"

that one clears the room every time.

[Lyn🦋 @_ayandamay]

Do you guys remember when nickelodeon would shut down on earth day and have that blank screen telling us to go play outside..?

[⋆⟢ @cyber_l0ser]

the dog in me is just a stray cat

[Lie 🧸⊹ ࣪ ˖ @fawnwithme]

Se você é mulher você é automaticamente minha amiga até que se prove o contrário
Se você é homem você é meu inimigo até que se prove o contrário

[Alex @alexxmalloy]

hunter biden summer, smoking cigarettes and telling everyone to go fuck themselves

[jes @peestains]

guy with mommy issues: i like being called good boy

girl with mommy issues: this wretched earth has no place for me but i am enslaved to my flesh and kin for why do i feel obligated to exist if my only purpose is to decay

[PmAmTraveller @pmamtraveller]

By Lorenzo Mattotti

[cher @mclIark]

smoking is a hobby if you do it enough

[candy cigarettes ⭐️ @h0tirl]

vaping around someone who doesn’t vape feels like i’m assaulting them

[daisy “dan goose” tackett @fatstevebuscemi]

you’re scared of double texting, i’m sending him 34 texts in a row about my weird dream.

[Bear @Beargirl_1]

Goddesses are usually not women that you can tame.

[prin 𖤍 @velcrolezbo]

murder-suicides always make my blood fucking boil. you have the balls to take your own life, cool. leave your wife and kids out of it????????