Jake

someone's in here

[Jake @lasswhole]

If there was a microphone in my shower I would have at least 3 mixtapes out right now

[Jake @lasswhole]

Green Day overbidding on eBay

[Jake @lasswhole]

It’s not about the lawyers I choose for traffic court, but my case against the parking tickets that de-fines me

[Jake @lasswhole]

If David Mitchell had twitter he would still be saying this

[Jake @lasswhole]

Green Day unhappy at a flea market

[Jake @lasswhole]

In 5th grade my teacher picked up me and another student and we went to Outback and saw Ice Age 2, the Meltdown. I still don’t know if that was weird or not.

[Jake @lasswhole]

@kbbbtweets

[Jake @lasswhole]

nearest great American cookie company store to me

[Jake @lasswhole]

Green Day overpaying at an auction

[Jake @lasswhole]

Green Day frustrated at a casino

[Jake @lasswhole]

Hey there Delilah
What’s it like in New York City
Heard you’re working in a strip club
Getting cash rained on your titties

Yes you do

[Jake @lasswhole]

saw a billboard for Alzheimer’s awareness. Thought about setting up another one a couple blocks down the road.

I shouldn’t have control over my finances.

[Jake @lasswhole]

It’s morphine but for your ears

[Jake @lasswhole]

@DanielAckerman @carter_Bock

[Jake @lasswhole]

Did Limp Bizkit spell it like that to be edgy or was Biscuit already taken

[Jake @lasswhole]

@EliLikesRice

[Jake @lasswhole]

@kylekinane wtf this guy doesn’t look like Elon at all

[Jake @lasswhole]

“Do not cross me” - a considerate bridge with poor foundation

[Jake @lasswhole]

head on, apply directly to the forehead

[im on the ither sight @jon_snow_420]

god: i have made Mankind
angels: you fucked up a perfectly good monkey is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety

[Jake @lasswhole]

Why would I get vaccinated when I can go to Dave and Busters for free