The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods

Goofy chick with too many opinions for my own good.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

@TedLasso if Rebecca and her Dutch man aren't endgame...
I. Do. Not. Want. It.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

Spotify called me out twice this morning. Once by creating a playlist for me called, "Vampire." Second with the song selection starting with Sarah Bareilles' "She used to be Mine."
In other words, I may be a social recluse, adverse to the sun, but I do love a good musical.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

Every college professor's email right now:
"Do I have an A?"
"Have you graded the final yet?"
"I turned in late work. Did you see it?"
"I have a C+ right now. Can we meet?"
Attendance/attention in their classes all semester:
🦗🦗🦗🦗🙋‍♂️🦗🦗🦗🦗🙋‍♀️🦗🦗🦗
#FinalsWeek

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

Today I learned about the world of professional competitive Monster truck driving.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

Straight men need to let women pick out their glasses for them.

...and clean them more often.
#dating #onlinedating

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

@DanHeesLX I'd give up cheese, chocolate, and beer to feel excited about #theatre again.#burnout #theatretech

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

@SenatorRounds Do you want to explain why you abandoned our troops and voted against the PACT act?

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

5. Require all guns to be brought in and be painted a bright color (orange). Recall any product that color. Criminalize owning any guns that are not this color, including cops. No more concealed carry. If you want to carry a gun we get to see it from a mile off.
#GunReformNow

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

I may not be an expert but I was raised around guns my whole life. We can do so much more. Here are 5 laws that we could pass today to keeps guns in the hands of responsible gun owners and prevent another mass shooting.
#GunReformNow #gunregulation #gunresponsibility
1/4

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

4. Require mandatory universal background checks, a 48 hour wait period, and psych evaluation for each new gun purchase.
Oh and while your at it tax the hell out of large round ammunition.
#GunReformNow #gunregulation #gunresponsibility
5/6

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

I'm about to layout my most controversial opinion.
Being obsessed with a dog's butt is weird. I'm looking at you #Corgi people.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

The first time I ever saw someone like me represented in a movie was Marla Hooch in #ALeagueofTheirOwn

[Kimberly Graham for Polk County Attorney @KimberlyforIowa]

Ask your local prosecutor (and/or people running to be your local prosecutor) whether or not they will prosecute people for having or providing an abortion.

This will likely be the next battleground for reproductive rights in this country.

https://t.co/ijJZPEs8c8

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

Just so we're clear if #Democrats had codified #RoeVWade earlier, it wouldn't have made a difference. We're fighting a bigger fight than that.
Let this sink in, the #SupremeCourt can overturn our laws by labeling them unconstitutional. #ReproductiveRights is just the beginning.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

#Ladies Do you ever look at a man's dating profile and it claims he has a graduate degree, but they look so dumb in all their pictures you can't help but wonder if they got that confused with graduating with a degree?

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

I just passed a guy towing a trailer with a donkey inside and "Hauling Ass" painted on the outside. This is my sign to give up. I will never be that cool.

[The Old Witch Hiding in the Woods @laughasmidge]

I have been internally screaming so much of today that my inner monolog is hoarse. 😱 #thisshowiscursed