Abzurdah

This hunger grows inside me like a tumor // Mirror, mirror don’t you see? what you show is ruining me. GW:50; UGW1:45; UGW2:40

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

ED: your body doesn’t need food
Me: so why is it screaming?
ED: that’s because you’re fat and you always want to eat
Me: ah ok I thought everybody eat everyday at least 3 times a day to survive but yeah I’m fat you’re right shit up fucking stomach

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

I think that someday anxiety is gonna kill me

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

what else can I do to stay alive cause I no longer know how to keep breathing

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

lately I'm so depressed, I'd say more than usually.
I don't wanna go out and when I do my anxiety increase and I can't stop thinking I need to go home and hide in bed.

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

Ate barely nothing and purged almost everything.

Thanks for continue destroying myself more each day ED.
I wish you're happy at least cause I'm so fucking depressed and I wanna die.

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

the desire to be always perfect is consuming me.

[☁︎ maela ᯓ★ @fxtcals]

unfollow me but i liked to the bone even tho it was shit

[𝖑𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖙𝖍 @SCORPlOMERCURY]

the recommended calorie intake for a 3-5 year old child is 1200 minimum we're really out here being this wildly unhealthy and still thinking it's not enough

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

+which is adding to a glass that finelly overflow. I'm emotionally and mentally exhausted. Understand that, cause that's why I'm physically exhausted and I can't do anything. Respect me.

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

I'm tired of being me. It seems like no matter how hard I try to improve myself, I always end up being a failure trapped in a bed. I don't wanna be the type of persons that hides in the fact of "I have depression/anxiety/ED and that's why I act this way"+

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

+but I also know I can't hide myself forever so I guess the only option Ii have is to go out of bed and live bad while I wait something to change. And people misunderstood why am I so tired cause I do nothing during the day, but it feels like every minute is a drop of stress+

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

This anxious feeling is killing me.
I'm so sorry, I didn't spect this was going to be my life.
I didn't see it coming.
I don't know how to stop this monster.
I don't know how to stop myself.
I don't know how to live anymore.
Forgive me, cause I'm always sad,cause you can't hep me

[Abzurdah @lauscountinkcal]

I feel really worthless, I feel like I'm not a person anymore, just a failure, a dissapointment with legs and a heartbeat which means nothing when all I feel is dead inside.