My partners dad is a narcissist and when I told him he was he said he spent all night googling and crying and then went back to his same behaviours. He also tried to buy me out of believing he was a narcissist by taking me to a festival and buying me drinks. 😭
I went through a 4 day hyperfixation on sociopaths and psychopaths and then wondered why my OCD felt so overbearing but also if I avoid those topics that's also going to make my OCD worse so.. it's a tricky one really.
I've been locked in today and yesterday, I've got so much done but I definitely deserve a break from socialising and work in general for atleast a day so imma play video, maybe have a bath or shower and just chillax.
I was pretty hyper aware and vigilant beforehand but it definitely feels more intense than it used to be, it's kind of weird because the first week it feels like everything has been going great but then you realise you have two more neurodivergences to deal with.
I've noticed I really suck at conversations worse than I did before now that I'm medicated and I don't know why that's the case well, that's a lie because I have a very strong feeling I also have autism (I've been doing research on it for years and I'm waiting to be diagnosed)...
But anywho, it sucks and also my OCD has gotten worse? Or maybe it feels worse now that my brains not trying to process a million thoughts a second either way I kind of hate being hyper aware of everything but I can't really control that.
I don't think I'll ever have the patience no matter how much therapy I do to deal with men on here that don't immediately give me what I want, I value myself too highly and I know how good boys should behave and I know who and who doesn't value my time.
Having so much to say but needing to limit yourself to 10 posts a day because otherwise the automated AI thinks you're a bot will always be what makes this app lame and boring. Just let me yap.