lazy_ink_bro

Welcome to my journal of chaos and unsent letters. 110% honest, makes stuff up sometimes. Not responsible for self-centered interpretation.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"Look at me, I’m a pOeT. I sit, drink, cry and write."

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"I'm your passenger princess-"
Yes, Diana. Yes...

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Your Puppygirl just killed a dog.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Steak is toast.
Heat up, flip, heat up.
Steak is toast.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Time machine works.
Just wait for 2034. You ain't ready.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"I have an idea, but I feel like you're gonna shoot me down."
Yes. What's the idea?
"Can we have a conversation in a southern accent?"
Oh, I'll shoot you up.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

The amount of times I wanna hang you, you could be a buttoned shirt.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"Genders are a social construct."

So are banks and insurances.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"Read the room."
"I'm dyslexic."

What.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Club Night Talks:
"I'm ovulating - just in case you wanna try for a baby."

"Thanks for the info. I'll use a condom."

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Up there, they don't care - because bombs always fall down from above.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Maybe I should be more like my predecessors.
Stand up.
They'd be proud. Enjoy what you can, but defend what you should. Whatever it might cost - it'll be uncomfortable now, but it'll be better afterwards. Stand up.
For the children you don't have now, but friends will have soon.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

A little bit more of "Eye for Eye" and the world will turn blind.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"You ask AI when to meet your plug!"
I haven't heard of a much more brutal roast in recent times.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Accidentally said "Andre Turd" instead of "Andrew Tate".
Welp. Same thing.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

People think they're being sneaky.
But don't worry - you left footprints on the floor.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

"I forgot" aka. "Ain't gonna tell you shit."

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Coworker: "I got all the girls calling me- What should I do?"

Me: "Wake up from the coma."

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

Me: "I woke up like 4 times tonight - I feel like shit."

Coworker: "Oh...I got used to it."

Me: "Yeah, YOU got a kid. But I use condoms. That's the thing."

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

I aM an ALphA mALe.
I hAvE TesTosTeRone and A pODcAsT.

[lazy_ink_bro @lazyinkbro]

What's next? Venezuela being in possession of Weapons of Mass Destruction?