Titty Contour

I read toilet bowls like tea leaves.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

this looks like a poster for a Taylor Sheridan show

[kat🪽 @zenisball]

how far we’ve fallen wtf

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Weapons (2025)

[Brian Allen @allenanalysis]

Kyle, TX: Video circulating from @reporteaustin shows an adult attempting to put hands on high school students during a protest — and the students defended themselves.

Leave kids alone. Peaceful protest isn’t an invitation for intimidation.

[Bryan Johnson @bryan_johnson]

starting a new protocol

[Gen Z Bruce Fan 🫨🦅 @GenZBruceFan]

In Deliver Me from Nowhere, Bruce Springsteen says his favorite hotdog condiment is mustard but in real life, Bruce Springsteen HATES mustard so much he did a whole yap about it during a show 😭

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

I love when people do this to me because it’s always people who can’t figure out to pronounce my name 😍

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

@PetreRaleigh I had Cool interests as a middle schooler because my parents had taste and forced it on me but it actually made me deeply uncool so like….there was no winning as a millennial middle schooler.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Made my boyfriend watch real housewives of SLC and he said Angie K reminds him of this diva.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Do u know how crazy it is that I was literally emailing some of my brides while on the way to my dads funeral.

[Doctor Odyssey News ⚓️ @DoctorOdyssey]

so there was this show…

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Makes sense that all of the “Wuthering Heights” critiques are reactionary and premature when all of the wuthering heights girls in school were Christian horsegirls who acted like they were homeschooled.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Entered a fugue state and bought these

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Wow. I really predicted something here, didn’t I.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Still reeling over meeting an Italian man named Luigi. My shriek when he said his name could be heard in the next parish.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

@BrendaJ69492764 @NoCisgender I went for a bra fitting 2 weeks ago. I’m 35.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

My boss’ boss was bragging about all of the hot dogs he ate the other day so you better believe I told him about this.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Boyfriend saw this at the vhs rental shop and said “this is us” and everyone I’ve showed it to has erupted with laughter and agreed.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

One of the only fights my boyfriend and I have ever had was about Tar which is honestly so funny I can hardly control myself when I think about it.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

yes yes yes

[Film Updates @FilmUpdates]

Anna Biller’s ‘THE FACE OF HORROR’ has begun filming.

Starring Jonah Hauer-King, Kristine Froseth, Ellie Bamber, Leo Suter and Bella Heathcote.

It follows a knight who marries Eleanor but grows bored and pursues a wealthy noblewoman, until Eleanor takes bloody revenge.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

(Was a wonderful trip because I kept on taking conference calls while staring at the lake and my friends husband would run out to give me caviar when I looked stressed. Ozarks, baby!)

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Did things at the lake this week that are going to make my dermatologist murder me.

[Titty Contour @LeithMaria]

Did things at the lake this week that are going to make my dermatologist murder me.