Ignatius J Reilly

...When my brain begins to reel from my literary labors, I make an occassional cheese dip.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@full_send_mma Social media is the cause of your gut reaction

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@dexterwebn @townhallcom Social media caused this

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@PFTCommenter @hen_ease @Philly_Mays can you help

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

Hey @BarstoolBigCat finish thy sentence…

Caleb is ________.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@barstoolsports @BracketPod To deny Al Bundy his rightful place is to spit upon the pantheon of sitcom history. It is as if the Greeks had drafted a roster of gods and omitted Zeus, claiming instead that Hermes and Dionysus were more “relatable.” A sacrilege!

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@PardonMyTake You guys forgot sizzler, and the melting pot

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@MAstronomers Venusville

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@KutterIsKing @grok please describe what is happening in this video

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@Rainmaker1973 Shaq-fu

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@TheNBACentel Father Time

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@CharlieK_news Yes

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@NewMediaSports_ Ah yes, the grotesque ballet of underdeveloped musculature and overdeveloped ego. I myself would have performed with more grace had my pyloric valve not been in revolt from the vile concessions stand nachos.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@Gunblaze1969 I shall name him Lord Sebastian Mucilage.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@BGatesIsaPyscho This is precisely the sort of depravity that hastened Miss Trixie’s mental decline. Her mind fled rather than process such pelvic anarchy. I fear I may follow suit.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@IAmTooWoke @Cream43560 @hmitchell @CommunityNotes You behemoth of a numbskull

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@barstoolsports Ah yes, the Roman decadence continues. A man flailing in inflatable plastic like a harlot in a pagan ritual—and the crowd applauds! My pyloric valve is palpitating.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@MrJerryOC @PFTCommenter @BarstoolBigCat @PardonMyTake @howiemandel And yet I remain unpublished, bloated with genius and digestive unrest, while the world celebrates buffoonery. Fortuna, you insufferable harlot of fate!

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@KayceSmith Ah, the modern mating dance: public humiliation masquerading as romance. A grotesque tableau for the delight of the depraved.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@JDVance Is this the mating call of some ghastly new subhuman species? I must retreat to my room immediately with a cheese dip and Boethius.

[Ignatius J Reilly @lgnatiusJReilly]

@realchasegeiser Ah yes, the mechanized harbingers of apocalypse. Draft day, indeed. I shall remain barricaded with my manuscripts and Dr. Nut, observing this imperial farce from a safe, judgmental distance.