lifewithbrian

Our son, Brian, is full of unintentional comedy. We just try our best to write it down when it happens. You know, for posterity.

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

B: "When I grow up I wanna be a neurologist."

Dad: "Oh yeah?"

B: "Yeah! I wanna study animal bones!"

Luke: "That's a meteorologist dude."

Me: "No, that's a paleontologist...you're both wrong."

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

Throwback to the time Brian heckled his own coach for throwing him "bad pitches".

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

(Brian, tying a napkin around his neck at dinner)

Luke: "Dude, what are you doing?"

Brian: "I want to look like a real gentleman at dinner. AND I don't want food on my neck."

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

Brian comes out of the bathroom -

Husband: "What were you doing, bud?"

B: "Poopin."

H: "Did you wipe?"

B: *Eyes look up pensively*

H: "LET. ME. LOOK. DUDE.". *Sees a fountain of poop.* "OMG DID YOU WIPE!?"

B: "I USED TWO WHOLE PIECES DAD!"

Me: *Keeps sipping my wine.*

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

B: "Mom - money is just metal confetti."

Me: "Yeah, I suppose it is if you're making it rain with loose change."

B: "Huh?"

Me: "Nothing buddy."

[lifewithbrian @lifewithbrian13]

Luke and Brian arm wrestling-

B: You're hurting my arm ankle!

L: Your what??

Me: Wrist. He means his wrist.