madeline D

lend me your eggs

[madeline D @lilbageI]

This was the last good tweet I had and so this will be the last tweet I ever have #fuckelon

[madeline D @lilbageI]

Haha so is there a mr gender?

[madeline D @lilbageI]

@gaythotsauce How did it go

[madeline D @lilbageI]

1 bird: aw he lonely
2 birds: aw they’re in love!
3-6 birds: squad!!
7+ birds: terrifying, awful. What are they planning

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I think if I didn’t know how to tie my shoe as an adult I’d wear slip ons. That’s just me tho

[madeline D @lilbageI]

Dunkin hashbrowns taste like pool water but in a good way

[madeline D @lilbageI]

hr gave me a Pepcid

[madeline D @lilbageI]

Just said ‘hot girls have tummy problems’ to someone I’m pretty sure has the authority to fire me

[madeline D @lilbageI]

The salem girlboss trials

[madeline D @lilbageI]

@conisbigbabyboy Are you gonna follow

[madeline D @lilbageI]

did you know they sell seltzer without the alcohol and you don’t even have to show your id

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I’m an orthodox stoner I start celebrating 4/20 at midnight

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I want to be the first lesbian president to get impeached

[madeline D @lilbageI]

@Dr_BongWater MORE WET WALLS

[madeline D @lilbageI]

We are less than two years out from the first public celebrity throuple mark my words

[madeline D @lilbageI]

Completely made up a niece to make small talk with an Uber driver… why did I do that I have two real nieces

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I would like to mute the word airfryer from my life

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I have empirical data

[madeline D @lilbageI]

Queers love survivor

[madeline D @lilbageI]

I just learned what Joe Rogan looks like on accident praying I never find out what he sounds like