Lillian Maxwell

A strange and anxious human with a tendency to read, binge watch tv, and make random bits of art. Certified Creator of Smaller Human.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Me at 10pm: I’m going to go to bed early tonight because I’m exhausted

Me at 12am: This is the perfect time to add witty commentary to my amazon wishlist!

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

I just hardcore checked out some dudes dog and I think he took it the wrong way.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Day 3 of the election: I’ve returned to Twitter.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

I’m starting to think the presidential debate was filled with fictional characters. The author with the unrecognizable accent? The quarterback having a midlife crisis? What’s going on?!

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

My roommate is complaining that she can’t hike for a while since she recently had surgery on her spine. Twice. Last week. She says she doesn’t like “flat walking”.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Just got into a legit argument with my fiancé about what would hurt more, being slapped in the face with a twizzler or a male strippers dick.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

6 year old:If you see me crossing my fingers it’s not because I’m lying it is because don’t want to get the cheese. There are a lot of cheese touchers on my bus. I’ve gotten the cheese a lot before. I think I still have the cheese

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

When I was growing up my mom would drop me off at a birthday party and come back hours later, a new rejuvenated woman. I, on the other hand, am being held hostage at a birthday party for small humans. What has this world come to?

[Mikael Thalen @MikaelThalen]

I've gone down a black hole of the latest DeepFakes and this mashup of Steve Buscemi and Jennifer Lawrence is a sight to behold

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

I have the flu and while I would like to imagine my cats have uncharacteristically gathered around me in a show of emotional support, I sense they are really waiting for me to die so they can munch on my dead body.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

I was just happily watching a video compilation of sloths over my boyfriend’s shoulder and the next thing I know I hear is some lady’s voice saying “I was 21 when my father was hit by a car”. I was not emotionally ready for the harshness of that transition.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Got sucked back into this confusing vortex of humanity in order to follow my daughter’s kindergarten teacher.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Haven’t been on twitter for years, I didn’t even realize I was still posting to this!

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

#StrangerThings got me like 😱😶🙌🏻

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

I'm so happy I'm not one of those people who has that gene that makes cilantro taste like soap.

[Lillian Maxwell @lillian_maxwell]

Super casual pool photo lol