linzwriter

I dig food. I love to cycle and run. I am a Mom. Interwebz professional by day; assassin by night. On a good day it all balances out.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

All’s I’m saying is that if I had an auto tuner and girl on a carousel horse, surely I could be the musical guest on SNL.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I feel like the explicit language symbol on Post Malone songs in iTunes is redundant. It already says Post Malone.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I decided what I want to be when I grow up. @awkwafina’s best friend.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I really really wanna be a back up dancer when I grow up.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Will 3.2 beer go away in OK in Oct.? If that is the case, I'm going to start hoarding gas station Modelo like it's the apocalypse. #coasterbeers

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Oh the season of plentiful parking is upon us!

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I can’t quit laughing at the irony of Melania putting out an anti-cyber bullying campaign and Oliver North named president of the NRA?! What’s next? Snoop tops the Gospel charts? Oh wait ...

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Maybe they would have believed me if I told them her name was “Bob.” #unecessaryquotes @ Couch… https://t.co/f3w3WHs89m

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Truth: my first crush was on Boy George. That lasted from 1983 until Dirty Dancing came out.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I hate the English rule about I before E. It’s weird.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Ok. I change my mind back. Backup dancer.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Go. Away. Winter.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Mom will you play that song we love to sing really loud to and drive around the block so we listen to the whole thing -Nola #winning

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

I changed my mind. I don’t want to be a back up dancer. I want to be a rapper. I got hoodies, jeans and sneakers on lock.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

@campfirewood That’s why everyone should be friends with @campfirewood

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

If someone doesn’t list Walk On The Wild Side as one of their favorite songs, you shouldn’t be friends with them. #ahustlehereandahustlethere

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Really? Wasn’t Sponge Bob the cartoon bad enough?

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Some days you just think man I’m so awesome I must be as tall at Mindy Kaling. Then you Google it and dammit she’s 4 inches taller.

[linzwriter @linzwriter]

Mom will you teach me the running man? Yes Bob! I have been waiting your whole life for you to ask me that.