Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack

We're all just cowboys on the lonesome prairie of time, baby 🤠

[Lindsey Graham @LindseyGrahamSC]

Statement from the Office of U.S. Senator Lindsey Graham (R-South Carolina).

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

When the fajitas come out Dead at 71 #LindseyGraham

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@thetrailerqueen This post is epic bacon fr

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@thetrailerqueen There are skinny white twinks everywhere for those with the eyes to see

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@thetrailerqueen Thoughts on real emergencies during a date?

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@thetrailerqueen Like starting a lawn mower

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@SamIsNotOff Gay Cowboy/Racist Cowboy DMZ

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@vanillaopinions Addicted to losing party

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@thetrailerqueen Beware the false hater, the snake in the garden. Beware his forked tongue, condemning true righteous haterism in favor of gossip. Let his treachery not sway you from the divine light of being a Real Hater.

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Thinking of posting on Facebook for the first time in years just to mark myself safe from Hurricane Milton

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

My boss is texting me every day to ask if I have any updates on my resignation. He wants my attention soooo bad

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Literally always saying this

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Normally working 48 hours in 4 days would give you 8 hours of overtime, except if you work over the weekend, when a special fairy known as "Pay Period" shows up, during which time your employer gets to not pay you for working more than you are contracted to. Normal workplace.

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

If I meet a genie my first wish would be to be able to take $20 out of any charity I want. Salvation army? Give me 20 bucks. TERFS with gofundmes? Pay up. Republican campaign PACs? Gimme a Jackson. I wouldn't even need the other two wishes

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

For some reason I don't believe you

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

I go to work every day and open all the sketchy emails I can because I want to get phished sooooo bad and it makes my managers really angry but they can't fire me because I gave the IRS access to my job's payroll information (the company has been so incredibly hacked)

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Nervously googling "which ear is the gay ear" outside of a piercing studio before walking in and getting my dick pierced

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

@Misfitpariah181 This post was made in pure adoration for the musical wonder that is ABBA, don't get it twisted

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Oh, hit song "Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" By Swedish musical group ABBA, we're really in it now 😮‍💨

[Scratchy Dick's Big Slut Crab Fuck Shack @Litsponge]

Not to sound like an old cunt but most young people's inability to endure silence while performing literally any task is probably an indicator that something (not saying what) might be negatively affecting our attention span